Gerald D'Cunha

Pic.: Anima D'Cunha F or last couple of Sundays, I found Kannan to be quite. It is Almost two years now since we first met at our Tai Chi class. I never found him as quiet – as withdrawn – as I found him recently. He always had some interesting and inspiring stories to tell… he hopped from one to another and yet another… All this would happen either during those few minutes before our class started or during our short breaks… None of those stories came planned nor would he remember them once told… But, I would remember and come home and weave a nice blog out of them… A quiet Kannan, therefore, was just unthinkable… So, yesterday, during one of the breaks in our Tai Chi session, I asked Kannan, “Sir, we have hardly interacted during last some sessions…. Unusual, isn’t it?" ‘’No Gerry, not unusual,” Kannan quickly brushed aside my observation. “Most of us go through these moments of withdrawal and low profile… and, I really think it is a natural cl...

Pic.: Fr. Reginald Pinto The other day, I was discussing something with a gentleman, and, suddenly the discussion turned quite heated. I was in my usual form - as gentle and passionate I could be… but, not aggressive. The other person went quite ballistic, with unpalatable language. Yes, the matter pertained to someone else; nothing was aimed at me… Yet, I was trying to help him see the necessity of being less brash and aggressive. Obviously, he had not appreciated my view; and, he was justifying his method by being more vocal, more aggressive, now. Just then, his 7-year-old son stormed into the room. Perhaps, he had heard the familiar voice of his dad while playing with his friends outside. The gentleman quickly asked his little-one to go outside and play. But, the little-one refused to go. “No, I want to be here,” he said. “Raja, I told you to go out and play,” the father reminded the son, “here, our meeting is going on.” “No, I want to...

“If you think, by being sarcastic, you can come about as witty, funny and humorous,” I made it very clear to a young-man, a while ago, “your thinking is wrong.” “Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit,” I cited an old saying. When we are sarcastic, we are not direct, not open and sincere. We taunt, we hint, we lie and we hold back… Mostly with the intention of making the other person look stupid, feel guilty and small… We do it to shunt him out… by making others laugh at him. And, certainly, that’s not any decent wit or healthy humor. It cuts through the other guy’s vulnerabilities… Like an arrow, it pierces through his heart… That’s why, in psychology, the sarcastic guys are called ‘Snipers’… They indulge in what is known as an ‘indirect aggression’. Often, the sarcastic people, who indulge in indirect aggression, are detested more than the abusive ones, who indulge in direct aggression. At least, we can openly see and clearly hear th...

I have told this story countless times during our PD sessions, particularly during the sessions on ‘Assertiveness’. What is so impressive about it is that, this story is ‘ageless’ in true sense. Not only, that it has been there as a folklore for hundreds of years, it also clicks with all the age-groups… the silver-haired, the young-eagles and, yes, the little angels. Yesterday, I told this tale to the little angels. I could so effortlessly convey the message I wanted to: “Honey, we should learn to be ‘assertive’ in life. Else, what happened to this cobra will surely happen to us.” Long time ago, in a village temple, there lived a Swami. The people from the village visited this temple daily to offer their prayers. On the way to this temple, there was a huge banyan tree, and under this tree, there lived a poisonous cobra. One day, while the children were playing near the tree, a small child stamped on the cobra and was bitten by the c...