WITH YOUR OPEN ARMS... AND NOT CLOSED FISTS

“If you judge others, you will have no time to love them!”

This was one of Mother Theresa’s favorite lines. “Yes, if you are so busy judging your fellowmen, where, in the world, will you have time to love them?”

To ‘listen’ to them?...

To appreciate what is good in them?...

To be a little more patient and tolerant with them so that you can overlook their flaws?

To ‘accept’ them as ‘humans’ like you?

To strike a fine friendship or relationship with them?

True, our ‘judging’ comes on the way… of ‘loving’ and ‘accepting’ others… of building up fine relationships with them.

Often, it is interesting to observe as to why we do not easily trust others?... Why we approach them with suspicion?... Why we step out of our homes with fear and distrust tucking under our hearts… with our tightly fisted hands crossed against our faces in defense?... Why we cannot meet the world with our open arms, even though we have heard those ‘horror’ stories of deceit, crime, rape and betrayal?...

Mind doesn’t easily trust… Heart does!

“A thief only sees another thief in every one!”… He doesn’t trust easily… He can’t…

And, that’s how Mind is!

It operates, mostly, from our past unpleasant experiences… often, just some rumors and stories we had heard here and there – Yes, our Minds operate from fear, distrust and lack… and, therefore, are unable to meet the world with open arms… unable to see the bright side of life.

Everything that we believe need not be true. We need to ‘examine’ our beliefs before they turn into heavy millstones around our necks. Yes, we need to challenge, sometimes, our beliefs…

Our fears…

Our self-doubts…

Our lack of trust in others…

Our opinions about others…

Our thoughts about scarcity… and someone taking away our ‘bread’…

“Fear is our best friend,” 

we hear someone motivating us with these words, 

“Make him your ally along  your journey

 towards a successful life.”…

No, never before you meet your fear face-to-face…

I like this story:

Once, a middle-aged Christian couple came to live in their ground-floor flat of a new Society . The man, Mr. Pinto, would leave early morning for work and return late in the evening. The whole day, the lady, Mrs. Pinto, would be at home… and, in a few days she began to complain to her husband as to how bored she was.

When the husband learnt that another Christian family, D’Souzas, lived on the fifth floor, he felt very relieved. He asked his wife, when he was out on work, to go up and introduce herself and befriend.

“Did you go up, honey?” Mr. Pinto asked his wife that evening.

“I did go up,” the wife replied, “But, when I read the warning on their door – ‘Beware of Dog!’ – I got scared and rushed back home.”

Mr. Pinto knew how scared his wife was of  dogs… hence, he assured her, “Don’t worry sweetheart, today evening, I will take you there.”

So, that evening, after Mr. Pinto was home, he took his sweetheart and headed towards D’Souzas’. But, the moment they were out of the lift, on the fifth floor, the lady gave out a loud cry, “DOG!!!!”

“Don’t worry my love,” the husband tried to pep his frightened wife, “I am there!”

No use. The lady would not allow her husband to ring the bell. Finally, he gave up… and brought his scared wife back to the ground floor.

And, Mr. Pinto did attempt to break the jinx a couple of times after that… But, the lady would not allow him to ring the bell on the fifth floor!

Then, one Sunday morning, after the Mass, the Pintos happened to meet the D’Souzas. Immediately, Mr. Pinto began to recount to the D’Souza couple the story of their ‘failed adventures’!

When D’Souzas heard this, they began to laugh loudly.

“Why, what happened?” asked Mr. Pinto, obviously, very puzzled and a bit offended.

“My dear friends, it is two years now since our dog died,” Mr. D’Souza consoled the Pinto couple, “Only, we have failed to remove that warning on our door!”

GERALD  D‘CUNHA

Pics.: Gloria Pinto