DON'T LIVE A LIE...

There is nothing wrong in crying in public… and crying like a baby, too. Yes, in full view of the world, too. Nothing wrong… If you feel like crying, feel overwhelmed… go all the way and sob like a baby… Let the world see you cry, let them know how human you are… how honest, how genuine…

And, when you do that… Take it from me: they too will… Your hearts will connect!

Honest people cry.

One of the important things, I keep reminding our youngsters when they are on stage is: “Don’t deny your feelings… Own them up!”

In the start, they do not understand the message of what I have said. 

“You are nervous on stage is a fact,” I explain to them, “Acknowledge this fact… Do not deny it… Do not suppress it, control it or manipulate it… Don’t live a lie!”

Often, I encourage the young ones to openly admit on stage that they are nervous… their palms are wet and cold… their hands and legs tremble… hearts pound… and, the minds have stopped thinking, clouded by fear. “Hold your wet, cold and trembling hands high up and show to your audience,” I prod them. And, they do… and, they like it! For, when you have openly admitted that you are scared and nervous, what else is there to be scared of?

Was it not this very fact that you wanted to hide from your audience? That, you did not want them to know - you were nervous, scared?

Was it not the burden of this very thought that had crippled you with fear and self-doubt?

So, when you yourself disclose to your audience this ‘truth’… you are being honest, genuine… Your mind and heart are in synchrony… and, you come about very authentic, powerful. You do not handover the power to your audience… You hold the keys of your own self-confidence, and well-being.

Likewise, any feeling: sadness, guilt, anger, happiness, gratitude, love, reverence, and of course fear.

None of these feelings are ‘alien’ to our existence… they are human feelings, and you are supposed to ‘live’ them, live them fully. 

Thus, if you are extremely happy about something, and your heart says you must share is: Do, please.

If you are extremely sad, and if you think your heart can be a lot lighter by sharing it: Please do.

If you are touched by someone’s gesture or magnanimity, and your soul throbs with the surging feeling of gratitude: Please do not wait, do.

Anger may not be easy to express in public –

 and yes, often, not dignified to do – 

but, please do even that, if need be. 

Let others know, 

that you are angry for the right reason. 

But, if at all it needed.

Tears need not be so calculative. Please shed them as much as you wish… and, till your heart becomes normal.

Neither have you sinned nor have you borrowed… Yes, you are neither a sinner nor a debtor… You owe nothing to anyone, except YOU!

That is the uncomplicated principle of dealing with your feelings: Live them… and, live them fully… and, yes in full view of the world!

Don’t live a lie, not for God’s sake... but, for your own!

GERALD D’CUNHA

Pic.: Arathi Rourniyar