Gerald D'Cunha

T here is an old Arabian proverb. It goes like this: “Both, the fast and the slow, will meet each other on the (same) ferry boat.” I get the point… I miss the point! Obviously, when I see myself on a fast lane, it’s clear, that I have missed the point. And, when I see myself on the slow lane, yes, it’s clear, that I have got the point. Life has been like this, to me, all through my six decades… Run, only to realize, that, no matter how fast I run, in the end, I will have to meet my slow-counterparts on the same ferry boat… So, why run, at all? But, I run… Because, I live! Then, some wise soul comes along to show me the amazing beauty of bird-nests… How slow and steady, always, do it so amazingly… And, even if the big birds and big humans destroy their homes in a blink… They, will patiently build it again! M y wife and I have just returned from a two-day Tai Chi camp at Lonavala. As we stepped out of the Tai Chi hall,...

“We have two lives and the second begins when you realize you only have one.” -           Mario de Andrade, Brazilian poet T here are only two kinds of people in this world: Those who want to be right, and those who want to be peaceful. T o the first kind, Life is never too short… They think, that Life is long enough for them to prove they are right. Proving to be right is central to their existence… Minus that obsession, that sole battle, there is no purpose for their lives. You see many of them waging their battles even from their death-beds… even when they know there is nothing to prove to anyone from a death-bed… even when the entire Life is wasted on a blind pursuit… Yes, they don’t mind taking their I-want-to-prove-‘am-right battle to the graveyard! T o the second kind, Life is too short to be wasted with mindless battles. The desire to live in peace is central...

“Good things happen when you get your priorities straight.” - Scott Caan I believe, that our personal peace should be our personal priority. Unless we make it a top priority in life, the unrest within will continue. From my own personal experience, I have learnt that the incessant need in me to prove myself right and someone else wrong… yes, this need in me is the biggest roadblock for my personal peace. Therefore, the choice before me is very clear: Should I strive to be right or should I strive to be peaceful? As I go along my life, I encounter many people… strong disagreements and, even, friction, often, throws up the challenge before me: Should I go all the way to prove myself right and him wrong… or, should I drop my need to be right and settle for peace? There is another challenge, even if I decide to settle for peace: What if the other person is unwilling to concede? What if he is hell-bent in not only proving me wrong but also to...

"Peace is the only battle worth waging." -  Albert Camus I f we need to experience peace outside, we need to first experience it inside. If we need to experience peace inside, we need to let go of our need to be ‘right’… to prove the other person – our tormentor – ‘wrong’. The need to prove the other person wrong – and prove ourselves right – stems from our ego.  It is difficult to nurture the hope for peace – ‘Aman ki Asha’ - as long as we hold on to our hurts, wounds, misgivings… In other words, holding on to our past memories is the biggest roadblock to this fresh journey called ‘Aman ki Asha’… the ‘Hope for Peace’ Many of us think that it is either being naive or being stupid to think of peace when our opponent is busy plotting ploys against us… “Trust doesn’t work there,” they remind us “Don’t be weak.” A child is pure… It has the shortest memory… It quickly stops crying and it quickly starts smiling… We have long ceased to be children...

Pic.: Sonia Asrani “Don't fight to be right, but fight when you are right.” Amit Kalantri I can’t expect my fellow-being to follow my religion, or political party... worship my deity or follow my leader… I can’t expect him to eat the food of my liking... dress like I do, read and appreciate what I do… I am civilized and intelligent enough not to expect that from my fellow-being… Ditto when it comes to him: He doesn’t expect me to, either… Yes, live and let live is the guiding principle for our happy co-existence in this world… Now, the trouble brews when I try to demean my fellow-being’s faith, political ideology, food and cultural habits… So long as I keep my affiliations private and do not make an ugly display in public, there is beauty in my relationships… But, once, I start hard-selling my Gods or Leaders in public… that is, the moment I start becoming a propagandist… I lose all my reasoning ability… I begin to behave like a mob…...

Pic.: Sherry Haridas “When I despair, I remember that all through history the way of truth and love have always won. There have been tyrants and murderers, and for a time, they can seem invincible, but in the end, they always fall. Think of it, always.”   ―   Mahatma Gandhi I have, always, found a lot of solace in the statement: “Being peaceful is more important than being right.” If I believe in its opposite – “Being right is more important than being peaceful,” I should be prepared for a life of never-ending conflicts, enmity, compromise with ethics, company of disgruntled people, and, above all, isolation… In the long run, the human heart aspires to be at rest… To let go and feel the quiet space inside… So, the being-right mindset is, always, donned by the one who has put his own ego-thrill before anyone else’s welfare…The larger-good is a foreign vocabulary in such a person’s kingdom… Losing is tough to accept f...