Gerald D'Cunha

Pic.: Chetna Shetty A mother of a teenage boy called me up, two days ago. She wanted to talk to me personally about the problems faced by her son. So, the next day, we met. She explained to me, that her son had lost his self-confidence, begun to stammer and lost a year because of stress. She had shown him to counselors and got him treated through a psychiatrist. She told me, that there had been a lot of improvement… though he had not fully gained his self-confidence back... During the course of our discussion, I could gather, that the boy’s self-confidence had collapsed essentially due to the burden of parents' high expectations… Both, the father and the mother, did all the dreaming for this young boy… As a little kid, perhaps, it was okay; but, not as a teenager. It was difficult for the young-man to handle it and he was breaking down under the burden of his parents’ expectations… When I subtly pointed it to the mother, she was not ready to accept it. “Sir, ...

I watched, today, the movie – ‘Jab Tak Hai Jaan’. Both my wife and I loved the movie, immensely. This Post is not about this romantic movie… but, about that young-man, who at 80, conceived it, directed it and produced it… And, who died… with his boots on! It is about man’s passions and dreams. It is about believing in your heart… and pouring it in your work… It is about remaining young and romantic till there is breath in your soul! So, a few questions have still not ceased haunting me even after hours of coming out of the theatre: Do our hearts age? Does the flame of romance remain aglow in all of us till there is breath of life? Did Mr. Yash Chopra has a premonition of his death? Was the title – ‘Jab Tak Hai Jaan’ – supposed to be for Yashji’s life, rather than for his movie? I admire men and women who live passionately till the end of their life… Who keep doing things they deeply believe in… Who remain eternall...

This young college-student was sharing with me her story. Some months ago, she had come too close to one of her childhood friends; and, before she knew it, this friend had become her ‘boy friend’! It felt good. Really good. Great! Initially, that is. Suddenly, it felt like you were a winner in life… You suddenly looked so beautiful, so strong and your world appeared full of bright promises. Yes, the feeling was so special! The need to be with your special person was so forceful… the need to talk every second of the day, the need to know every  popping thought, the need to share every little incident, the need to promise on every setting Sun… the need to be assured, cared for, trusted and honored… the need to be ‘only yours’… ‘Only mine’… And, the need to tell that, hear that, feel that… and, long for it over and over and over again. And, to do it in a loving embrace! You know you are in ‘love’… when all this happens to you! And, as the ...

Really loved to read today’s blog, Sir. Two days back, my T.Y. B’Com student, Sweety, commented on my blog. I had written about two of my very close friends, Tanish and Yommie… nine-year-old chaddi buddies. And, Sweety had loved it. I had sent a quick reply to her: Thank u Sweety... Glad u liked this 'kid-stuff'! My next post will be on 'big kids'... Sweety and her gang!!! Love, Sir. This morning, there was this rejoinder from this young lady:  Hahahaha thank you so much sir!!!  It would be my pleasure  if you write something   about me and my mischiefs… because, in your stories, there is always a part which tells what you experienced or felt.  I would love to know that through the blog. SWEETY. My response to Sweety’s wish was instant. Madam, I will write today, I promise! Thanks for reading and trusting in what I write! ...

L ondon must be the land of young hearts! Yesterday, the evergreen hero of Bollywood, Dev Anand, Passed away there… He was just 88! Some months ago, the legendary painter, M.F. Husain, Too died there. He was only 95! And, both these maestros lived like teens Till they gave out their last breath… They dreamed big dreams… young and childlike dreams; They loved life… the bright and vibrant side of it; Their hearts remained tender, romantic And untouched by the weariness of the passing time… Yes, Dev Anand and M.F. Husain, Both, died with twinkle in their eyes, Boots on their feet… And romance in their hearts! And, they, both, died in London… The land of young hearts. Age is only in the mind… Age is only for the body… The mind becomes tired and the body gets wrinkles… But, the heart – the heart of a zestful soul – Plays forever like the little kids do, Sings forever the way the teens do. My heart doesn’t age… If it did...

"If you can not love yourself, You can not love another.” I meet many young college students who are head-over-heals in relationship. They call it ‘Love’. One of the most difficult things to deal with in such relationship, for most of them, is: the desperate clinging of the other partner. “Why didn’t you call? Why didn’t you meet? Where did you go? What did you do? Who was there with you? Why can’t we go out? Why did you wear this? Why did you go there? Why? What? When? Who? Where? Whose?... Yes, all the possible ‘W’s’ in the world. Yes, in the world of our ‘Love Birds’. What starts as some romantic sweet-nothings, now is marred with endless probing, judging, accusing, blaming, sulking, fighting and pain. Most of them are unprepared to deal with this volatile shift… They end up hurting each other; more importantly, they end up hurting themselves. They begin to wonder: Where has all the sweetness gone? Why am I feeling so lonely now? Why is this suffocation? This fear? T...

I have heard this: Some men, when they drink, behave like small children… The child in them comes out. And, some men, when they drink, behave like demons… Yes, the demon in them comes out.  I have also heard this: Writing needs inspiration… You need to be intoxicated with it. I know it is true… For, whenever I am ‘intoxicated’ to write, The stars cease to be stars and the hills cease to be hills! The waves of the ocean and the waves of the soul All get mixed up… God becomes a human and man becomes a God… Age seeks its shelter in a young heart… And a young heart yearns before me:  “Dear, can I watch you… just watch you, all my life?”  I have heard: You can not be inspired and dead, at the same time!

For her. And, for him, at seventy-two. At seventy-two, I would be gone, perhaps. Even Gandhi looked so old at that age. That is the age, when so many spend their time singing lullabies for their great grand children. That is the age, when some hurry up with their Wills, and some end up in old-age homes. But, this couple has great plans for their future. Their life begins, now. She has just delivered a baby girl ... and, she yearns to have a son, too. Maybe, in two years from now. He is ecstatic; just on cloud nine. To have this gift of life, he had to spend a fortune. A farmer from a remote village that he is, he had to mortgage his fields to fund their dream: of bearing their own child. They are not only proud of their feat, they are confident of paying off their debt, and bringing up their children. Their life begins, now. I am, almost, fifty-one. I have one son who is, soon, going to be seventeen. "One is more than enough ... too much!" I am liar, if I don't share how ...