Gerald D'Cunha

  “The successful among us delay gratification. The successful among us bargain with the future.” Jordan B. Peterson (12 Rules for Life – an Antidote to Chaos)   L ately, my wife and I have begun to have early dinner… mostly around 6 or 6.30 in the evening. Then, take a light breakfast around 9 or 10 in the morning. This  gives us a window or 13 – 16 hours. We have become used to it, now… Earlier, when the dinner used to be at 10 or 11 and retiring time used to be immediately after that, seeing my Jain friends completing their last meal before the sunset and taking their breakfast after the sunset – and the hospitals serving dinner to patients around 7 p. m. … yes, seeing all this, I used to wonder, “How can they follow such an eating habit… Dinner at 6 or 7…?” Even, for a blood test, when we were asked to keep a 12-hour fast, it felt like a mission impossible! Well, with age and sickness comes wisdom, too! My wife and I woke up to this ancient discipline of eating with a...

I have heard many saying, that if you do anything consistently for twenty-one days, it becomes our habit. Conversely, it means, that if we wish to uproot a bad habit from us or replace it with a good one, we need to keep attempting it for twenty-one days, with our intent, focus, desire and determination… Twenty-one days are three weeks… It’s three weeks since I posted my last Blog… So, the question is: What was I trying to uproot from me? My habit of blogging daily? Writing my daily notes has been a very old habit in my case. I was extremely shy and scared boy… afraid to express myself in public. So, writing my tender thoughts – my anxieties, fears, joys and sorrows – in my private dairies gave me immense relief. The habit had begun, as I told, when I was still a teenager… I did not realize, then, that it would become part of my nature, my character and personality… So, I did not start with Blogging. I started with writing notes in my private journal...

Pic.: Azriel D'Souza I t's more than a week now, and I haven't published a single post on my blog. That's something unusual; for, I love writing... It is my deep need... that, I should express every day. Yes, it makes me feel extremely happy, centered and healed, too. Fair enough.  But, how much of that need to write and express every day comes from my 'ego'? How much of that comes from my obsessive-compulsory behavior... yes, 'disorder'? The OCD, they call it in psychology. In fact, someone asked me yesterday, "How do you feel when you have not written a single post for over a week now?" He was my close friend and he knew how much happy blogging and writing would make me... When smokers stop smoking and drinkers stop drinking, they experience some withdrawal symptoms. When people like me – those who aren’t used to fasting, who love to eat well – suddenly decide to fast, yes, certainly, we will experien...

Pic.: Usha Prasad N ot a single moment passes by without an urge in me to react: say something strongly to someone… That someone can be my own spouse, son, student, relative, friend, an associate, a neighbor, or, even, a stranger… There is this urge in me to say something strongly… An urge is a craving of my mind… a compulsion… an addiction… an instinctive habit… It is my weakness. Whenever I consciously abstain from saying what I want to say mechanically, instinctively… yes, whenever I use my discretion, better judgment, I can sense the feeling of self-confidence in my heart… I feel the power and strength… I feel I am in charge…  Yes, if just holding back a few strong comments, here and there, can give me that sense of well-being…  Then, imagine, if I can keep abstaining from reacting more and more and more! Like everyone else, I, too, know that all my thoughts and feelings need not be – and should not be – expressed. Similarly, all ...