Gerald D'Cunha

  “Fear is only as deep as the mind allows.”   Japanese Proverb   D o we all have some regrets in life? Like “If only I had not done that.”… “If only I hadn’t taken that decision.”… “If only I hadn’t worked for that person.”… “If only I hadn’t married that person..”… “If only I hadn’t invested in that Stock.”… “If only I was employed and not self-employed.”…"If only I hadn’t trusted that person so much.”… “If only I did not live at that place.”… “If only… “If only…” “If only…” Often, we are advised not to keep any regrets in life. Yes, that’s a sane advice. However, the reality is, that we do have many regrets in life. Not having any regrets means, that we haven’t lived at all… haven’t made any mistakes… haven’t taken any wrong decisions… haven’t had any bad relationships… haven’t burnt our hands… haven’t lost any money… haven’t come across any wrong people… haven’t eaten any junk food… haven’t ignored our health… etc. etc.   etc.… And, if we haven’t ‘commi...

Pic.: Aruna Anand W hat I like the most about this world is that it is imperfect! There is a lot of hope and peace in this truth! Every time I yell at my young students - over their bunking, late-coming, homework-skipping and, above all, over their casual, don’t-care attitude towards studies, yes, every time I lose my head over all this… right in the midst of my agony comes this thought: “Relax my friend… Relax. At their age, you were worse!” Yes, I was… And, this truth is enough to bring forth peace in my turmoil-stricken heart… M ost of us forget how bad we were, once… How imperfect! Treating the other person as a learning, growing and an evolving human being, just as I am, is a very important understanding, which I need to reinforce in me time and again. What actually happens is, that, as we learn, grow and evolve in life, we coolly forget that people around us, too, do… So, we look at our subordinates, children, students and the rest… and...

Pic.: Ruma Chatterjee I had a good friend, by the name Paul, when I was in college, in Mangalore. He lived quite far from the college, in an interior village. Paul loved the typical tailor-made polyester shirts and terry-wool pants and would wear them impeccably ironed. Some of his young cousins, who lived in Bandra, here in Bombay , would come down to the village during summer. They wore their crumpled tees and torn, stone-washed denims... and, yes, for days, they wore the same stuff! Now, our poor Paul had some tough time at home... His elderly grandma would give him an earful, everyday, as he spent a good deal of time ironing out his clothes: “Look at these Bombay kids... They have plenty of money; but they don’t show-off like you do... So humble and simple they are, that they are able to survive, for days, on those torn and crumpled clothes. Learn from them... You need your expensive clothes, and you need them crisply ironed... Don’t you?” The next day, in ...

I have just returned from my session with the BMS kids in the Mumbai College which I spoke about in my today’s morning post.  Anupam had invited me to conduct it, and I had agreed, without even my second thought. Anupam wanted me to make these kids ponder over the questions: How I chose what I did? Have I chosen BMS by a conscious choice or by default? Is BMS my choice or my parents’? Am I happy doing it… or, do I regret? Am I giving my best… Or, is my heart somewhere else?  Anupam is a young, dymamic trainer. In fact, he is a fresh BMS kid himself. But, unlike any other BMS kid, in Anupam’s case, it was training and mentoring that was crystal as a summer-day sky… He would invest his energies to achieve this goal. His, uncle Uday, had sown the initial seeds in Anupam… His late grandpa had inspired him with his volcanic energy… His aunts and sister had propelled him to go the extra-mile… And, so, here was our Anupam, at a very young age, in the ‘bu...