Gerald D'Cunha

  “The capacity to learn is a gift; the ability to learn is a skill; the willingness to learn is a choice.” — Brian Herbert   L earning shouldn’t stop. This means, we should be lifelong learners. But, then, there are thousands of things out there, which we won’t be able to learn… Did I say, “We won’t be able to learn”? Yes, I did… For, as Brian Herbert says, “The ability to learn is a skill.” And, skills need to be honed, developed, finetunes –- either on our own (self-develop, like Ekalavya did), or under some experts and trainers… What is interesting to note is, that our ability to learn (skill) is sandwiched between our capacity to learn (gift/talent) on one side, and our willingness to learn (choice) on the other… How interesting! Take swimming for example. I think, I am capable of learning it, and I am, certainly, able to learn it. But, if I have no willingness to learn it, it clearly tells, it is because I make that choice -- not to learn. This lu...

  “The beautiful thing about setbacks is, that they introduce us to our strengths.” Robin Sharma   I am never tired of telling young kids this: “Look, you need to know your strengths and build your self-confidence around it.” When I invite them to share some of their strengths, often, I find them clueless. They seem confused between talents and strengths; sometimes, between skills and strengths. I tell them this: “Talents are God-given; you are born with them… When you become self-aware, you discover, that you have a talent to sing, dance, speak, write, paint, design, play sport, tell stories etc.” We all are born with some of these talents. When we become aware of them, some of us go about turning them into fine skills… While some of us do it on our own (self-develop), others do it through training and coaching. That’s why some of us join classes for drawing, singing, dancing, speaking, designing, teaching etc. Every talent can be turned into a fine skill – and when...

  “Your talent is God’s gift to you; What you do with your talent is your gift to God.” Leo Bascaglia   I n life, need we do only ‘big things’ to feel good about ourselves? And, need we do things only with great fanfare to find validation? Many a time, doing ‘small things’, quietly, seems not only unprofitable, but also unfashionable… But, trust me, doing ‘small things’, quietly, is the surest way to truly feel good about ourselves. On the other hand, the desire to do ‘big things’ with great fanfare is a bottomless pit… It seldom gives us a true feeling of self-confidence. Therefore, the key to self-confidence is to do small things with a big heart. One way of reaching out to others – by doing small things, quietly – is through our talents. We all know, that our talents are God’s gifts to us. And, as Leo Bascaglia says, “What we do with our talents is our gifts to God.” For example, God has given me the gift of teaching, writing and motivating others. I hav...

  “Your talent is God’s gift to you. What you do with it, is your gift to God.” Leo Buscaglia   R ecently, when I had been to my hometown (to attend my younger brother Harry’s funeral), I was happy to meet Alwyn, one of my schoolmates, after almost five decades! It was just after I had spoken a few words in my eulogy for Harry. This friend of mine introduced me to his young daughter, who seemed extremely shy and overwhelmed by things around her. I could easily empathize with her, because I was exactly like her when I was of her age… feeling caged and tongue-tied! So, without being asked to do it, I was making her feel comfortable and reassure herself: ‘It’s okay’… ‘It’s okay’! Three days earlier, on the night of the funeral, when a few close family members and friends had gathered at Harry’s place, Kenneth, Harry’s son, brought his close friend, Roel, to introduce me to him. We quickly got connected, as our interests matched. Roel loved writing short stories, which h...

"Inviting people to laugh with you, while you are laughing at yourself, is a good thing to do. You may be a fool; but, you are a fool-in-charge.” Carl Reiner T wo separate messages received by me, today, from two different individuals – my friends – brought that much-needed smile on my face. Yes, my two friends did not know each other, and, they did not know, that their random messages had the potential of brightening up my day! Perhaps, one of the hardest things to do – at least for me – is to laugh at oneself. So, whenever someone does, I feel happy. M y first friend is one of the brightest and the most affectionate souls. He comes from a wonderful family… and, he is admired by every one he interacts with. Yet, in his mid-forties, my friend remains blissfully single! Some of us - not to mention his own family members – have been nagging him, “Settle down, settle down.” To which, my friend, who is a doctor by profession, has his mischievous res...

“The things you are passionate about are not random… They are your calling.” -       Anonymous E ven though I know, that our talents help us feel self-confident in life, I will never say, that our talents alone can help us in this. In fact, unless a talent becomes a fine skill, talent is of no value… It’s a waste. And, the process of converting our talents into skills calls for real discipline… we need the burning desire, dogged determination, sagely patience and perseverance, and, above all, some luck – call it God’s grace, if you like. But, unless our talents become our skills, it’s just not possible… The talent, which makes Amitabh Bachchan a legend, is his acting talent… Not any other talent. The talent, which makes Lata Mangeshkar a legend, is her singing talent… Not any other talent. The talent, which makes A.R. Rehman a legend, is his talent of music composition, above anything else… Take any one else...

L ast evening my friend and co-trainer, Anupam and I were on our way home after the daily training session. We have been holding these training sessions for the degree-college students in a suburban college. The management is very keen that these young kids should possess in them some fine soft-skills so that they succeed when they move from the campus to the corporate. My subject has, always, been ‘Self-confidence and Communication Skills’. It’s something I needed the most when I was these students' age… and, I know how significant it is and, importently, I know how I went about building up my own self-confidence and honing my own communication skills. So, it’s something I impart straight from my soul, and I have been sensing the instant connect of hearts. "One of the ways of building up your self-confidence is by becoming aware of your talents, skills, strengths and weaknesses,” I keep reminding the young kids, “It’s one of the legs of the stool cal...

G od has placed talents in each one of us here…. One talent or the other. If we do not agree with this, we have no business to strive for success… We have no business to dream. To dream, to succeed, we must first of all become strikingly aware of our talents. Well, if I have to speak for myself, I must become aware of my God-given talent – teaching, writing and mentoring. Yes, once I have become aware of my talent, I should believe in my capacity to encash these talents… I must constantly strive to hone my talents into fine skills… Success is always field-specific. In the field of our expertise, we can always shine… provided we give our all… and pursue it sincerely and passionately.  I am never tired of telling young-ones, to get in touch with their talents… believe in their self-worth… and follow their dreams. Many weeks ago, my friend, Jaypee, had shared with me this story of Michael Jordan… M ichael Jordan was born in 1963, in the slums of Brooklyn, Ne...