Gerald D'Cunha

  "we only have what we give.” Isabel Allende   N one of us is rich enough to eradicate the poverty in this world. The biggest Foundations and Charities in this world have been able to do only so much… Poverty, hunger, deprivation still run rampantly. Now, the Poverty shows up in differs avatars. There is poverty of mind, heart and soul, too. Lack of love is poverty… Loneliness is poverty… Lack of self-confidence is poverty… Distrust and envy are forms of poverty… Poor physical health is poverty. And, yes, lack of money – hunger and homelessness - is poverty. I have hardly done any financial charity. A few rupees which I may have given, now and then, are like casting   drops of water in a vast ocean. Putting it inversely, it’s like trying to empty the ocean – the ocean of poverty – with a teaspoon! It can be overwhelming! But, each one of us has been blessed with our own special wealth. We may be poor in terms of money; but, we may be wealthy in terms of oth...

  Pic.: Vimal Tulsiani “Someone helping you is not, always, your friend And, someone opposing you is not, always, your enemy.” - Anonymous I had promised my friend, Priyanko, that I would be writing on this passage, today. He  had shared it on FB, yesterday. True, we tend to call an opposing person our enemy in the same breath as we call a helping person our friend... The passage challenges this tendency in us... It tells: It is not not true... And, I agree. However, the first part of the passage – “Someone helping you is not, always, your friend” - doesn't excite me at all. Even though I know that everyone who helps me is, not necessarily, my friend - not a well-wisher of mine - I resist from calling him my enemy, either. For, I do not like to study the motive behind his help to me... Yes, I do not like to judge him... Let him, therefore, be... be a friend! What excites me is the second part ...

“One blind man cannot lead another blind man.” W hen Jesus Christ said this, He was referring to our ignorance. Thus, it makes sense to think, that you cannot enlighten an ignorant man when you are ignorant yourself. And, if you do, the obvious is bound to happen: both of you will end up in a pit! Likewise, there is an old statement that goes like this:  “It takes a happy man to make another man happy.” And, there is another:  “A sick man can not heal another sick man!” All these statements are related… and, the moral of their story is: You need to first put your own house in order before you venture out to do someone else’s. You need to find your own happiness, your own well-being, before you strive to find it for others around you. You need to nurse your own wounds, before you nurse others’. I firmly believe, that’s the greatest service you can ever do to humanity! ...

When I was in Second-year B’Com, I came across a man in my life. His name was  Norman. I was 19 and he must be 30. He had come up in life the hard way and was a compassionate soul. He showed a great deal of interest in me, in my progress… So, he kept directing me, motivating  me, even helping me financially.  But then, as months passed by, I felt a lot suffocated by his approach… Norman was dreaming for me, planning for me and even funding for me. Initially, I felt very cared for and loved… I felt a lot grateful to this soul. But, as I felt the strain of being trampled upon my individuality and freedom, I began to feel the irritation and resistance in my heart. It was simmering within me for months. Then, one day, around ten of us had been for a picnic. There, some statement this man made towards me triggered off my rebellion. I voiced my discomfort, my loss of freedom – and I found myself bluntly telling Norman : “Don’t manipulate me… Leave me alone!” ...

I had taught Yashoda about thirty-one years ago. She was in Eleventh standard. After that, there was no contact. About a year ago, the students from this batch had invited me to attend a re-union, which I did. I was there for some time and caught up with so many of my first-batch students. I had also carried with me about hundred copies of my book,‘Vaachas Chame’, and had asked the organizers to distribute the copies to each one present. I had blogged after some months saying that, even though the book carried my telephone numbers, e-mail and Blog details, none of the recipients had communicated with me. So, I had no clue whether they had received those copies or not. But then, it was okay. I had given those copies with no strings attached… And, if I really meant so, I had no business to expect any communication. Two days back, I was in train on my way back from Mangalore. I received this phone call. “Sir, I was one of your students from 1981-82 batch; my name is Yashoda…...