Gerald D'Cunha

  “To offer no resistance to life is to be in a state of grace, ease and lightness.” Eckhart Tolle   O ne of the surest ways to keep our peace is never to overplay our difficulties and challenges in life. While on the one side, you and I try to protect ourselves against Life’s unforeseen challenges, on the other side, Life, often, throws before us these challenges, and catches us off guard… Health crisis, financial crisis, relationship crisis – and a dozen more of them… Life is unpredictable… It throws before us fresh challenges, especially, when we really, really do not want to face them… Thus, I have come to this conclusion: No matter how big the challenge Life throws before me, I should never overplay it, never dramatize it… In other words, the lesser I resist, the more ease and peace I find. That’s the only way to find grace and courage… It is acceptance, the seat of peace. There is no answer to our angst: ‘Why me?’ The only sane answer, I have come to fi...

  “You have not lived today until you have done something for someone who can never repay you.” John Bunyan   E ight days ago, (on August 20) Judge Frank Caprio passed away after a gritty battle with pancreatic cancer. He has been my inspiration as he was for millions of people around the world. Judge Caprio was just a judge in the Municipal Court of Providence, Rhode Island, in America, where he served for nearly four decades. Yes, his heart of gold – blessed with compassion, empathy and healing humour   - made him a household legend… He did it in his courtroom by dispensing justice to very ordinary people who appeared before him for some routine traffic violations like over speeding, wrong parking etc. I n this fast and furious, seemingly heartless world, most of us had never come across anything like this in a courtroom. So, when we saw the way Judge Frank Caprio communicated with people who presented themselves before him, it was hard for us to believe, th...

    “People’s minds are changed through observation, and not through arguments.” Will Rogers T he dictionary meaning of the term ‘Cesspool’ is this: ‘An underground resourviour for liquid waste such as household sewage.’ It further describes it as: ‘a filthy, evil or corrupt place or state’… And, how true that is! Well, which cesspool am I talking about here, today? The figurative one… The toxic arguments, let me be precise. Like most around me, I, too, am aware of that impulsive need in me to argue with others, including my loved ones… often fiercely, with what they call - ‘teeth and nails’… Colourful way of describing the way most of us choose to argue and try to ‘win’, right? I have done that too many times… Only to end up feeling terribly bad, later. Because, when we argue with our teeth and nails, we resort to verbal violence… Invariably, it leaves our soul bruised and wounded. And, imagine, when we do that with our loved ones! So, these days, when...

  “A story, to me, means a plot where there is some surprise. Because, this is how life is – full of surprises.” Isaac Bashevis Singer   “B e careful”… “Take care”… “Sambhalke ”… these and many similar expressions have become a part of our daily vocabulary. Invariably, we use   all of them to express our love, care and concern for our loved ones. But, every day, as we step out into this world, you and I know, that we have these two options before us: We can either step out harbouring more trust and love in our hearts, or more distrust and hate. Thus, we have a choice - either to stretch our two hands in embrace, or cross them tightly against our chests in self-protection… Mercifully, knowing fully well, that this world and its people aren’t perfect, most of us do choose to walk out with our two hands stretched in embrace… harbouring more trust and fear in our hearts… Yes, everybody out there is not a crook – he or she is not there conspiring against us, tr...

  “When you can see God in small things, you’ll see God in all things.” Donald L. Hicks   T his must be the third or fourth time, someone – a Christian – called me up to check, “Am I speaking with Gerald D’Cunha?” “Yes, Sir, you are speaking with Gerald D’Cunha,” I answered. “Mr. Gerald, are you a Catholic or a Protestant?” the caller asked me, after identifying himself and the Centre he was calling from. That’s when I realized, that I had received such calls a couple of times before, too… Still, I let the caller continue… “Mr. Gerald, do we wish to know more about Jesus Christ, Mother Mary…” I stopped him… “My friend, I have received such calls before and I have informed them this: I am a Christian and a born Catholic. Jesus is the central force in my life, and between Him and me, I do not need any middlemen. My faith in Jesus is personal, however innocent may that seem.” The call ended… I remembered the blogs I had written following such calls earli...

  “Polarization affects families and   groups of friends. It’s a paralyzing situation. A civil war of opinion.” Mick Jagger   T he Independence Day  – I am referring to any Country’s Independence Day – only marks the day that country got free from a foreign rule. In our case, it’s 15 th August, and we celebrated it two days ago. As an Indian, I know how hard it had been for generations before me to achieve that freedom. I, therefore, feel privileged, grateful and blessed to have been born in a ‘Free nation’. Well, that being said, I see around me, and see within me - and ask: “Have I become free from my prejudices?”… “Have I become free from the curse of polarization?” Did I say ‘Curse’? Yes, I did… The British have left us, the Mughals and every other ‘outside’ rulers have gone… But, to see ourselves freed from social, religious, political and cultural prejudices, we need a different kind of ‘freedom struggle’. Territorial freedom, therefore, has on...

  “The greatest gift you can give your child is not material possession; it’s the gift of discipline.” Unknown   I have been teaching teenaged students for decades. Broadly speaking, I get to see two kinds of parents of these young students of mine… The first kind - I would say, the majority - shield their young ones fiercely… They defend their young ones’ behaviour and actions, even when correction is required. These parents are touchy, overprotective about their young children. The second kind - I would say, the minority – don’t shield their young ones where correction is required. They are firm when it comes to discipline. For, they know the old truth: The best time to shape a tree is when it is a sapling… Once hardened, it is impossible to shape the tree. One of these mothers, who firmly believes in shaping her teenager before he gets ‘hardened’, has been very, very consistent in her approach… She knows her only son like the back of her hand. She knows when ...