Gerald D'Cunha

“ My pain may be the reason for somebody's laugh. But my laugh must never be the reason for somebody's pain.” -        Charlie Chaplin D uring the campaign for Presidential elections in America in 2016 (Donald Trump Vs Hillary Clinton), Michelle Obama’s one statement had inspired me the most. She said: “When they go low, we go high.” Now, reflect on this statement… How profound it is! I had nothing to do with Trump or Hillary, nothing about who wins or who loses there… Still, when Michelle said that, I felt she was talking about a universal truth – an everyday truth – of Life… I come across this challenge every day… There are those bullies around me, who are chronically insecure and operate from fear, hatred and complete lack of trust. They can stoop to any low level to defame you and destroy you… And, often, they seem to succeed in what they do… And, this is where the true test of my character lies: Should I get

H ope, Faith… The more I face the challenges and uncertainties of Life, the more I get convinced that these words are not some hollow words. For right reasons, people, who cared for us, have ingrained these words in our minds and hearts… Imagine, the state of our lives, had this not happened! Every morning brings for all of us a fresh challenge or two… Some of them are really tough, really painful. God, prayer and grace… everything hinges on Hope and Faith. When we conclude, “Everything happens for our good,” or “Everything has a reason,” or “All things eventually settle,” or “This, too, shall pass,” or “Let go and let God in,” yes, we are able to conclude so, only because of our Hope and Faith. History is an open chapter. No storm, tsunami, earthquake or hurricane, no civil war or World War, no dictator or despot… no matter how insurmountable and scary they might have seemed, at one point of time… yes, all of them came with a ‘shelf-life’. When Time a

W e all have some conflicts in our personal lives, which we have never been able to resolve. When I say ‘We’, I really mean we all... Let’s me brutally honest: Don’t we all have some conflicts with some people in our lives, including very near and dear ones? Often, the conflict which seems extremely easy to resolve turns out to be the most difficult one to unknot. For some of us, it may be with our brothers and sisters, parents, spouses, children, uncles or aunts… while for the rest of us, it may be with our business partners, fellow members of the community, neighbours, political or ideological opponents… What is strange is this: so often, we come so close to end our conflicts and embrace; and, just when we are about to stretch our hands to embrace, something creeps in… and, there we are… unable to meet our eyes, leave alone our hearts! I think, no matter how noble and evolved we are in life, we will, always, have some people in our lives who wou

S ometime during 1985-86, I used to visit a young boy’s house to teach him. I knew his uncle, who was a popular doctor. “My nephew may drive you crazy,” I was forewarned, “But, I want you to help him grow up.” The 18-year-old, indeed, drove me crazy for many months! The class used to be at 7.30 in the mornings, at his place. I would be up around 6, leave home by 7 and reach his place five minutes before 7:30.  The young man would be still asleep, and, invariably, drove everyone at his place nuts… He would be, finally, ready to learn from me by 8! “Poor fellow may need more sleep.” Thinking so, I decided to keep the class at 8. But, the same- old story continued… He would be still on bed and people at his place would cajole and force him out of bed and I would be able to start my class only at 8:30… It was frustrating, crazy! I, somehow, completed my syllabus with this young man… But, I was not able to meet his uncle’s expectation. All my gentle and firm a

T he grass is, always, greener on the other side of the fence! Well, it, always, was… and, it, always, will be! Employed people, often, tell me, that a self-employed person like me is far better off than them. “You have the freedom to do ‘whatever’ you like to… Nobody sits on your head… You can get on with life on your terms.” I laugh. Rather, I feel sorry for those people, who think, that a self-employed person like me has the freedom to do ‘whatever’ I like to … Nobody sits on my head… and, above all, I can get on with life on my own terms. “Come on here, to this side of the fence,” I often, tease them, “You will find out how free I am to do ‘whatever’ I like to, and how much I can get on with life on my own terms.” Many young boys and girls, these days, live in a fool’s paradise. Someone has brainwashed them, saying, that, being employed under someone means losing your freedom, slogging like a slave and leading a life on someone else’s terms… A

S urprisingly, I did not find myself inspired enough to write during these last four or five days. Outside, it’s Mumbai’s busiest festive season… Ganesh Utsav. In the past, I have written many blogs related to this popular festival. However, this time around, I simply did not find the inspiration… Let me clarify: I did not find enough inspiration to blog on ‘any subject’, not just on the festival… Yes, it’s really surprising! Sometimes, the most mundane things around me inspire me to write the most sublime posts. And, sometimes, the most eventful things leave my soul untouched! Anyway, my writings have, always, been about ‘small things’ – ‘seeing extra-ordinary in the ordinary’ as I like to say. Life abounds with small things every moment of the day. And, if we are too busy filming these events, we may fail to simply observe them and relish. Maybe, that’s what I was doing during these last four or five days… Simply relish the small things! M y Bangaluru-base

“Touch has a memory.”  ―  John Keats L ast evening, my wife and I had been to the residence of one of my friends. His father has been bedridden for nearly five years with multiple health issues, including chronic kidney-failure. He doesn’t recognize people or remember events. Occasionally, for a fleeting moment, he does remember people and events… Then, that moment passes, and he slips, once again, into his world of dementia. I was lucky, last evening. My friend’s father recognized me and my wife. He held our hands and, through his touch, communicated a lot. During an hour or so, while we were at my friend’s place, I saw the same ‘touching’ scene: My friend held his father’s hand, even though the father was not in a state of recognizing what was happening around him. I saw the clasped hands closely… the touch… the gently-caressing fingers of both, the father and the son… just the way the lovers communicate in their intimate momen

T wo days ago, my wife and I watched the English movie, ‘Searching’. When my wife went to the ticket counter, fifteen minutes before the show, the young boy at the counter said to her, “Sorry ma’am, not a single ticket has been sold till now. Can you wait for another ten minutes to see if anyone else comes to buy?” We waited. Just before five minutes, two TISS students, who wanted to kill some 80-minutes time they had in their hand, and who didn’t mind watching any movie, were cajoled by my wife to watch this one. They asked no question and, with that, they two and we two landed up inside the theatre… Just before the movie started, a middle-aged couple walked in… And, that’s about it. Six!   The TISS boy and girl, who had only 80-minutes time to kill, left before the movie got over… and, that left four of us to do the honours! “Which movie did you say?” This was how a couple of my friends reacted when, later, I told them about the movie. Obviously, they ha