Gerald D'Cunha

  “Amateurs sit and wait for inspiration; the rest of us get up and go to work.” Stephen King   W e do not know how long we are going to live in this world. Still, all of us want to live a long and healthy life. But, whether we live a   short life or a long life - how does it matter, unless that life is a ‘productive’ one? Now, I do not want to discuss here on what is meant by a ‘productive’ life… Suffice it to say this: If our stay on this earth has helped, impacted, inspired people around us, I think, it’s a productive life. Else, it’s just a ‘long life’… just a number. Yes, we ‘existed’. That’s all. Joe Gonsalves, who passed away on Sunday due to Covid, in my hometown Mangalore, would have completed 100 years had he lived for another four months or so. But, his 99 years and 8 months on this earth was not a mere number… It’s an eventful, inspiring and humbling journey. If we ever wanted to know what's the meaning of the expression - ‘To die with one’s boots ...

  “Some only survive on your reaction. Let them starve.” Christine E. Szymanski   I t’s neither possible nor necessary to acknowledge each and every thing that comes our way; let alone react to them.   Yet, that’s exactly many of us seem to be doing… We try to stop on our way to see every passerby, every passing vehicle, every passing activity, every passing argument, fight or sight… and react. Every morning and every night, and through every day, we all receive a thousand things – good, bad and ugly – in our ‘inbox’, both digital and non-digital.   Do we have to stop to ‘read’, internalize, react or respond to each one of them? One of the fall outs of this crazy digital world is, that all kinds of people try to send us all kinds of stuff… It’s not possible to stop and acknowledge them or respond to them… There is, always, a choice to decide the privacy settings of our own choice; there is an option to click ‘Not interested’. Likewise, in life outside...

  “You could jump so much higher when you had somewhere safe to fall.” Liane Moriarty   S ome days ago, I had asked 13-year-old Darshil and his 11-year-old sister, Tirtha, to write at least five of their privileges in life. That day, during the Zoom session, I told them the story of Ekalavya, the tribal boy from Mahabharata. I tell about this boy, Ekalavya, in every Personality-development session, while helping kids, youngsters or adults to become self-confident and proactive persons… I call it ‘The Spirit of Ekalavya’ and, often, ‘The School of Ekalavya’. What Ekalavya did was the most proactive act towards building his self-confidence… No blaming, no self-pitying and no reacting. So, to me, Ekalavya was a better student, a better learner, a better young man than Arjuna. I am not interested in the archery… The story gives us enough proof for his brilliance in archery, too. But, then, to me, that’s a small feat on his part… The greater feat was, that he beat Arjuna,...

  “If everything is amplified, we hear nothing.” Jon Stewart H uman mind is wired to take sides! Confused? Imagine you come across a game on TV, social media or even at a local playground… You know nothing about the teams or players… Totally strangers… But, as you keep watching the game, watch you mind, as well… Are you rooting for one of the teams? Can you remain totally neutral? Similarly, imagine this: you are watching two people fighting along the road… Why? Even two bulls, dogs, goats, cats are fighting as you walk by… Is there a favourite out there? And, imagine this: you and I are watching on TV or social media so much of ‘fighting’ – mostly political – and allow ourselves to be affected by what we watch… what happens to our thinking? I don’t know about you. But, whenever I get drawn into this cesspool, I end up getting depressed – irritated, angry and very, very touchy and reactive. The worst part of this is: I am ready to spoil my close relationships for the ...

  “We forget that life isn’t as bad as we are making it out to be. We also forget that when we blow things out of proportion, we are the ones doing the blowing.” Dr. Richard Carlson   I t’s very difficult to tide over the ‘big stuff’ in life, unless and until we learn to tide over the ‘small stuff’. Now, what I may refer, here, to be ‘small stuff’, may not be ‘small’ for you, and vice versa. Most of us tend to lose perspective when faced with small irritations in life… We tend to ‘react’ without even   waiting to take the next breath. In the process, we blow it all out of proportion… We end up making mountains out of the molehills, as the old saying goes. The ability to pause before we ‘respond’ is, rightly, the definition of the word ‘Responsibility’… Our ability to respond. It helps us react less to what happens to us in our daily life… to every small, little thing. We are able to stand back – stand aside – and see the ‘small stuff’ as only that – a ‘sma...

I n Napoleon Hill’s famous book, ‘Law of Success’, he emphasized on many principles (Laws) of success. Essentially, they were nothing but the personal attributes, or, to be precise, the attitudes we needed to succeed. The ones that made a lot of sense to me, when I was ‘struggling and seeking’ in my life, were these two simple personal-attributes: Initiative and Enthusiasm. I was amazed to realize how easily these two attributes could be owned by all of us… How important and effective they were . When we are enthusiastic, we simply glow… It reflects in our speech and action… It is simply infectious! The attribute of Initiative goes hand-in-hand with the attribute of Enthusiasm. It is difficult to tell as to which comes first – Enthusiasm or Initiative… They are twins! Initiative is the quality of doing the work without being told. It’s the quality of going the ‘extra-mile’… doing the work with joy, not for money alone… Both, Enthusiasm and Ini...

A m I concerned about the political or social situation in our country? Am I concerned about what happens in Kashmir or on our borders? Am I concerned about what happens to our farmers, women and children? I do not live in an island… I am a social animal… Of course, I am concerned about everything that happens around me, near and far… But, as an individual, what can I do about the situation in Syria , North Korea or America? What can I do about the situation in my own country – Delhi, Kashmir, Uttar Pradesh, Karnataka or here in Maharashtra? L ate Dr. Stephen Covey, in his famous book ‘Seven Habits of Highly Effective People’, had introduced the first habit - ‘Be Proactive’. In this chapter, he had drawn our attention to two Circles in our lives: the Circle of our Concern and the Circle of our Influence. For most of us, what happens in America, North Korea, Syria, Kashmir, Karnataka, or Uttar Pradesh – yes, all these issues fall in the Circle of our Conc...

“I am sorry… Tried my best and I failed… Forgive me my ocean and my country.” With these words, Afroz Shah suspended the Varsova-beach-clean-up drive 110 weeks after he first started it… Alone, that was! But, has Afroz really failed? Not in my view.  To me, Afroz is a winner… an inspiration… a true hero. I have always believed in Afroz’s kind of initiative, his kind of ‘social change’. “Don’t ask what your country can do for you; Ask what you can do for your country.” I was in ninth standard when I came across these inspiring words of JFK’s speech in our English text book. This was how Mahatma Gandhi, (Afroz’s inspiration) carried out his mighty movement of social change: “Be the change you wish to see in this world”… Yes, don’t wait for the authorities and others to do it. You do it… Start from you and others will join you. This was precisely how Mother Teresa went about carrying out her mammoth mission: “I alone cannot change the w...

L ast week, I came across a young lady and her little son. The little-one had completed an amazing project on making this planet free from pollution and toxins. Both, mother and son, were sharing with me their ideas with great enthusiasm and conviction… What a lovely though! What a lovely learning at such tender age! When a child really becomes conscious and responsible on issues pertaining to the planet, which houses all of us, I think… there is hope for this planet. For, the consciousness expands… the more and more little children begin to grasp this truth early and grow up holding themselves responsible for the mess created on this planet, then, there is bound to be the ripple-effect of such consciousness… At least, I think so! Imagine, if the greed continues… Imagine if we continue to destroy trees and forests, bring down hills and mountains, convert deserts a into waterlands and waterlands into concrete jungle…  chase animals out of their forests… dig d...