OUR HIDING PLACES

I am brave, I am bruised
I am who I'm meant to be, this is me
Look out 'cause here I come
And I'm marching on to the beat I drum
I'm not scared to be seen
I make no apologies, this is me

-     From the song ‘This Is Me’ (;The Greatest Showman)

One of my favourite English movies is ‘The Greatest Showman’ (2017). It’s based on the life of P.T. Barnum, who founded the famous American Circus company ‘Barnum & Bailey Circus’. He lived between 1810-1891… That’ some 200 years ago. But, he lived with a hundred dreams in his head… He dreamed big dreams, off-beat dream, and, above all, with his heart unapologetically ambitious…

The movie ‘The Greatest Showman’ is a great musical. Every song has beautiful – inspiring – lyrics. I, often, show some of these songs (particularly, ‘Never, Never’ and ‘This Is Me’) in our PD sessions. Of course, there is a definite reason why I show these songs to our young ones… Listen to this one:

P.T. Barnum was a daring showman… He put together a circus of not animals, but of real people. And, mind you, he went around tracing people who were in hiding… like a woman with beard and a man with... and so on. Those were the days when the American society treated these kinds of people as social outcast… The families, who had these humans with ‘defects’, hid them in their houses… They were never, ever allowed to show up!

So, P.T. Barnum, with his persuasive skills, succeeds in bringing out these 'defective humans' out of their hiding to showcase them to the world… The is the inspiring story of P.T. Barnum… his rise and fall, his straying away  and homecoming… Listen to this one:

Last evening, during the PD sessions,  I had shown to our young ones both these songs. At one stage, I called 16-year-old Palak to the stage. This girl has been absolutely committed to our programme, never missing a single session, and always showing up before time. She had told us about her dream… of becoming an English teacher. But then, our Palak has found it difficult to express her thoughts from the stage... She is so overwhelmed by the audience… anxious, scared, filled with self-doubts and self-criticism… Whether they would accept her as she is or not… Whether they would find her worthwhile or not… Whether they would like her or laugh at her… Yes, a hundred thoughts like these had made Palak hide in her place every day… Yes, the same place where she hid every day!

Yesterday, when Palak was unable to express herself on the stage, my friend, Savita (a psychotherapist) came to her rescue. At one stage, Savita gently pointed to the ‘hiding place’ of Palak… “Do you know Palak, why you have been sitting in the same corner every day?”

Palak moved her head to convey, “No ma’am.”

“Because that is your hiding place,” explained Savita, “You need to come out of that place… Sit at a different place every day, with different friends… Speak to them… Shake hand with them… Show up, say ‘This is me… I am glorious!”

Palak’s face lit up!  As she got off the stage, I encouraged her to shake hands with her fellow-participants  - all humans with defects – “Say 'Hi'… Shake hands,” I prodded…

Palak was giving her hand, now… But, there was still that ‘holding back’… there was still that ‘hiding’ self in her hands…

“Did you watch that moment when the two lovers hold their hands in the song, ‘Never, Never’” I asked the class, “Did you observe the moment when they let go their hands?”

“Yes Sir,” they had…

“There is life in those hands, beta… There is strength… There is a whole world hiding in them,” I said, “Give your hand; breathe your life into them.”

From the hiding place to the place under the Sun… Yes, this is the story of every Palak in this world… Is it not?

GERALD D’CUNHA

Pic.: Nicole Gubin-O'Ryan

Videos:   20 th Century Fox Portugal/ Warner Music Spain