Gerald D'Cunha

Pic.: Azriel D'Souza I n life, a great deal of our stress comes from our deep need - rather a misplaced desperation - in us to prove ourselves before others... We have a need to please others… gain their approval, validation, appreciation, praise and love… We desire to be in their good books… We have a desperate need in us to ‘show’ them we ‘are’ good, efficient, successful, well-off, intelligent, respected, very religious, have great families, and all such things… As someone said, “We want to stand on top of the mountain and shout: “Look, I have arrived!” I am 57 now. But, the child in me? Joe became my fast friend when I was in F.Y.B’Com. He is two years older than me… He is a successful businessman, now; his two daughters are married and they have children… Back home, in Mangalore, Joe has a massive mansion, cars… and he is blessed with a loving family… But, when we were in college, our home-situation was identical –...

“So, what is a regular day like when you are not doing a film?” The answer to this question impressed me. The interviewer, Roshni K Olivera, ends her interview with this question in today’s Bombay Times. And, the interviewee, actress Kajol, gives this answer: “I feel like I am doing a lot, but if someone asks me what exactly I have accomplished, I don’t know… putting my son to sleep, feeding him, taking care of things in the house amount to a lot of work. But, yes, I haven’t arrested 14 criminals in one day or saved the world or anything of that sort! (laughs).” Kajol is a famous actress; her mother, Tanuja, was ever more famous in her hey days. And, yes, her macho-husband, Ajay Devgan… yes, they have a lot to harp on as far as the thought that crosses every mind is concerned: “What exactly I have accomplished in life?” People talk about ‘balance’ and ‘priorities’ in life. Even a great social contributor, such as Gandhi, could not claim such...