Gerald D'Cunha

W hen I look back at 2018, the year that has just gone by, I have a good reason to smile… and, a very good reason why I should learn to live less anxiously about my future. I did not want some things to happen in my life; they did happen. I did not want some people to come in my life; they did come. On the other hand, I desperately wanted some things to happen; they did not happen… and, I anxiously waited for some people to come in my life; they did not come! So, what is the take away… the moral of the story? The less protective I become, the safer I feel… The less I worry about what may happen tomorrow and who will do what to me… yes, the more peaceful I will be. Worrying, doubting and trying to be protective – I mean the excessive amount of all these – are more of a habit. Mind tends to slip into this habit… keeping us always on the tenterhooks, the edge. It, certainly, is not a healthy way of living. Yes, when I look back at the year tha...

“A day of worry is more exhausting than a week of work.” -        John Lubbock A dear friend of mine just sent me this message… “No problem… Park it for it two days… Take a worry break.” Park for two days what? Well, my burdens, my anxiety… my worries! I had just messaged him voicing my nagging concern… expressing my anxiety and worry… “Just expressing to get a perspective,” I had written to my friend… So, my friend had this piece of advice to me: “No problem… Park it for two days… Take a worry break.” Believe me, the moment I read it, a childlike smile adorned my face and, I could feel the weight falling off my heart… I was worrying about some events which were expected to unfold after 4 to 5 days. My friend’s advice was simple: “Park your worries for 2 days!”… Literally, lift them and put them in the parking slot! The third day or the fourth day or the last day… the sol...

Pic.: Pushpa Mistry Kamath I love giving these three mantras of Public Speaking to whoever comes to me for that ghyan – little kids, young adults, adults or silver-haired. “Hey, here are the three mantras ,” I tell them at the very outset: You shall speak LOUDLY... You shall speak CLEARLY... You shall speak from your HEART! Amen. Then, I tease them, “Your Public Speaking course – the Rocket Science... The Nuclear Physics - is over. You can go home, now!” Actually, they all can go home, now! Just think of it! If you speak loudly, clearly and from your heart, won’t it be sufficient? Won’t it help you carry across your message to your audience effectively? Too much is made out of it. Fear will not go away till we all die... But, somehow, we have been made to believe it will. So, like a dog trying to catch its own tail, we all run in circles, desperately, to finish our fear off, once and for all! If I tell them, “Honey, it is okay to be afra...

Pic.: Chetna Shetty T he question, “Is your glass half-empty or half-full?” has been so overused, that it doesn't look useful, anymore! Along my path, if I come across one person who is a chronic cribber or a nasty manipulator, I, also, come across another who is empathetic and supportive.  In fact, if I patiently look along my path, I will find more friends than foes, more cheer-leaders than fear-leaders... But, like most others, I, too, tend to hear the deafening cries of those who boo... and think that’s how it is... That’s not how it is! For every half-empty glass, there is half which is full... And, that’s how it is!  I need to see that reality, immediately... Else, I should be prepared to spend my life-time worrying, cribbing, blaming... yes, like a loser in life! O nce, there lived a woman, who had two daughters. The elder daughter was married to an umbrella vendor, while the younger one to a noodle vendor. This woman worried a...

It seems, our world is going to end in 2012! I thought I should bring about at least one change in me before the doom comes. Yes, at least one. Now, which one is that? For fifty-one long years, I have worried about all sorts of things. Nothing of those things - the things I had feared - have come to pass... I have survived! Now, they say the doom is really approaching... just three years away from our doorsteps! I thought, if every thing is going to go in tsunami, inferno or tremor - whatever that is - why should I worry at all? At least, three years are left to enjoy this life. Yes, THREE LONG YEARS! Let me bring about, at least, one change in me before I go... we all go. Suddenly, it hits me, again, that to enjoy life, I must learn to take things a little lightly. I must learn to laugh a little more... laugh at myself... not to take things - events, situations, comments, arguments and everything else too seriously. I must learn to let go my need to control, the need to be appreciated...

My needs keep me going, free; my wants keep me enchained, imprisoned. I woke up, this morning at 5.00. A light, hot cup of tea took care of my well-being till 9.30. I had a bowl of salad, made of boiled peas, tomatoes and onion. I am really done. For the lunch, I have packed for me two chapatis and a cauliflower dish. That would sustain my appetite till 5.00 in the evening. I will have a hot cup of coffee, and some toasts. I need not worry till 9.00 in the night. Some rice, daal and a vegetable dish ... the supper is over. A good sleep of six to seven hours, till it is another morning. What else is required to keep my zest for life on? I read a lot. I write a lot. I talk to my friends, well-wishers and family members a lot. I go out with my family to watch good movies, occasionally. I walk some distance, every day. I do some light exercises, including the breathing ones, every morning. I like to enter the kitchen to cook, sometimes ... to clean up the mess that piles up. I go to church...

On another day, I would have worried about using the title I have chosen for this article. For, it is the title of one of my favourite inspirational-books. This little book - a true classic, in my view - contains dozens of small articles which help us calm down whenever we get worked up on our daily, small stuff; yes, whenever we 'sweat our small stuff'. The ideal place to park this book is: the pillow side. So soothing it is! Richard Carlson, the author of this book, tells us, in the introduction, the story behind the title. He tells, that he had gotten the famous author, Dr. Wayne Dyer, to endorse one of Carlson's earlier books. He had written to Dr. Dyer for a similar endorsement for the next one as well. But, there was no response from the famous author. Meanwhile, the publishers of Mr. Carlson's new book decided to carry Dr. Dyer's previous endorsement on the new cover, too. When Carlson saw the cover of his new book, he immediately slipped into a panic mode! ...