WHY DON'T WE TELL?
Raman, 40, will be celebrating the 'Silver Jubilee', this month. Twenty-five years ago, when he was 15, he had a showdown with his father. The communication between the father and son broke down that day. Staying under the same roof, they haven't spoken a word with each other, since then. So many have tried to broker peace, but in vain. The deadlock continues; the 'wall' still stands.
The best time to knock down this wall is even before its foundation is being laid. The decision to embark on an ego-trip is akin to the decision to ride on a tiger's back. Once you mount, you had better know that you are at the man-eater's mercy. Even though you don't like it, you continue to ride. To get off his back is to offer yourself for his lunch!
Ego-trip is a dangerous path. It is a path of 'no return'. No one has ever made it on this path... Never, ever. The best way to make it is never to venture into it in the first place. Leave the beast alone.
How important is peace to us? How dearly do we value the relationships in our life? What is more important to us: to be right, or to be happy and peaceful? What is more honourable: being adamant,rigid, and remain in an endless turmoil of confrontation, or being pliable, flexible, and experience simple joy and brotherhood?
The choice is always there before us. It doesn't take a great effort to make peace. It always takes a clear intention, the will of our soul. It comes from the deep, inner longing. The heart longs for it; the soul longs for it... Then, the mind simply surrenders to that longing. Ego is the play of mind. To love, to experience peace and healing, we need to heed to the voices of our hearts, our souls. It is always a childlike, innocent yearning. It is always simple and uncomplicated. All that we have to do is to say 'Yes' to this voice.
Peace eternally awaits us on the other side of the wall! When the wall comes down, we will realise, how stupid we had been all along... weaving all sorts of stories about the 'bizarre people' on the other side - hating them, condemning them, swearing to destroy them... When the wall comes down, we will realise how similar we all are - yes, the East Germans and the West Germans ... the citizens of the US and the USSR. Between the Twiddle Dee's and the Twiddle Dum's runs not only a river but also a wild human mind!
When the walls collapse, the men, women and children simply cry. Simply rejoice, celebrate.
We need to communicate our intention. We need to express our desire for peace and brotherhood. There is no other way to bring the wall down; no miracle is going to happen. The wall will come down, only when we 'will' for it. Raman will speak to his father - or the father to Raman - only when they 'will' for it, earnestly yearn for peace.
The story of the Hindi movie 'Shakti' is a moving testimony for this invisible wall called 'ego'. The ace storytellers - Salim-Javed - had scripted this story so brilliantly. How the upright father, Dilip Kumar, and the rebellious son, Amitabh Bachchan, love each other but suffer the hell-fire of a long ego trip... how, one moment, their hearts bring them so close to each other, and, then, how, the very next moment, their ego-soaked minds take them away, so far ... This is a remarkable saga of simple love being made complicated by lack of clear intention and communication. In the final scene, Amitabh, the son who had strayed away into the criminal path, is shot down by his father, Dilip Kumar, the uncompromisingly honest police officer. In this scene, the son dies in the arms of his father. Before the last breath goes out, the father keeps urging his son not to go away... but, the son keeps saying that it is not possible, that he has to. The father fervently reminds, for the last time, to his son:
"Son, I have always loved you."
The son asks: "Dad, then, why didn't you tell me that?"
One must be a rock not to melt, when the son dies with those words!
Yes, why don't we tell, that we love?
Raman, it is not too late, dear, to tell... or, even, to ask.
GERALD D'CUNHA
The best time to knock down this wall is even before its foundation is being laid. The decision to embark on an ego-trip is akin to the decision to ride on a tiger's back. Once you mount, you had better know that you are at the man-eater's mercy. Even though you don't like it, you continue to ride. To get off his back is to offer yourself for his lunch!
Ego-trip is a dangerous path. It is a path of 'no return'. No one has ever made it on this path... Never, ever. The best way to make it is never to venture into it in the first place. Leave the beast alone.
How important is peace to us? How dearly do we value the relationships in our life? What is more important to us: to be right, or to be happy and peaceful? What is more honourable: being adamant,rigid, and remain in an endless turmoil of confrontation, or being pliable, flexible, and experience simple joy and brotherhood?
The choice is always there before us. It doesn't take a great effort to make peace. It always takes a clear intention, the will of our soul. It comes from the deep, inner longing. The heart longs for it; the soul longs for it... Then, the mind simply surrenders to that longing. Ego is the play of mind. To love, to experience peace and healing, we need to heed to the voices of our hearts, our souls. It is always a childlike, innocent yearning. It is always simple and uncomplicated. All that we have to do is to say 'Yes' to this voice.
Peace eternally awaits us on the other side of the wall! When the wall comes down, we will realise, how stupid we had been all along... weaving all sorts of stories about the 'bizarre people' on the other side - hating them, condemning them, swearing to destroy them... When the wall comes down, we will realise how similar we all are - yes, the East Germans and the West Germans ... the citizens of the US and the USSR. Between the Twiddle Dee's and the Twiddle Dum's runs not only a river but also a wild human mind!
When the walls collapse, the men, women and children simply cry. Simply rejoice, celebrate.
We need to communicate our intention. We need to express our desire for peace and brotherhood. There is no other way to bring the wall down; no miracle is going to happen. The wall will come down, only when we 'will' for it. Raman will speak to his father - or the father to Raman - only when they 'will' for it, earnestly yearn for peace.
The story of the Hindi movie 'Shakti' is a moving testimony for this invisible wall called 'ego'. The ace storytellers - Salim-Javed - had scripted this story so brilliantly. How the upright father, Dilip Kumar, and the rebellious son, Amitabh Bachchan, love each other but suffer the hell-fire of a long ego trip... how, one moment, their hearts bring them so close to each other, and, then, how, the very next moment, their ego-soaked minds take them away, so far ... This is a remarkable saga of simple love being made complicated by lack of clear intention and communication. In the final scene, Amitabh, the son who had strayed away into the criminal path, is shot down by his father, Dilip Kumar, the uncompromisingly honest police officer. In this scene, the son dies in the arms of his father. Before the last breath goes out, the father keeps urging his son not to go away... but, the son keeps saying that it is not possible, that he has to. The father fervently reminds, for the last time, to his son:
"Son, I have always loved you."
The son asks: "Dad, then, why didn't you tell me that?"
One must be a rock not to melt, when the son dies with those words!
Yes, why don't we tell, that we love?
Raman, it is not too late, dear, to tell... or, even, to ask.
GERALD D'CUNHA
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