THE BEAUTY AND PEACE OF LATE-BLOOMING











A couple of days ago, I was talking to one of my brothers over the phone. This bother of mine lives abroad with his wife and the school-going son. Like all other parents, my brother and his wife too had been struggling with the issues relating to a teenager’s growth, particularly studies. The constant anxiety and silent irritations… these, eventually, either make many of us, parents, either cynical or wise in life…

In my brother’s case, thankfully, it has been the latter… It has left them wiser. “It’s all in the family,” my brother said jokingly, “our son is exactly like how we were – a ‘late bloomer’… You know how we found our way, I am sure, he, too, will… He will be a survivor.”

I started laughing in joy… How true that was! The only difference between we bothers and our children was: our parents weren’t educated and didn’t have high expectations from us, their children. But, they did remind us, constantly, to study, behave well, be pious… and, then, they left us at that… None of us became scholars… None of us made headlines… Yes, as the years rolled by, we figured out what was ‘special’ about us… we trusted our instincts, made our own mistakes, and landed wherever we are now… My bother said, “I have no regrets about my own mistakes and late-blooming… So, it’s important for me to have that trust in my son.”


It’s not easy to come to such conclusions, let me tell you. We do not live in islands… There is that social pressure, which, quietly gets into our system and makes most of us forget about our own late-blooming in life, about our own mistakes. We coolly forget how our own parents did place trust in us, gave us many chances… and, allowed us to bloom in our own gardens, at our own time… Yes, for many of us, it’s difficult to operate from such quiet wisdom…

We become impatient, intolerant… We react!

We all…

But, then, somewhere along this struggle-some path, we choose: either to become cynical or wise… To live with turmoil or peace…

There is something in all of us that makes us find our way in life. I did, my brother did… and, our children, too, will…

It’s as simple and as true as that…

We did not become how the society wanted us to become… We have become how we wanted us to. And, why is that impatience, intolerance and lack of trust when it comes to our own children?

This wisdom comes to settle in our souls a little late, too… That’s the beauty of late-blooming…

May our children bloom in their own gardens… at their own time. And, may we, their parents, quietly rejoice in peace.



GERALD D’CUNHA

Pic.: Kamal Kishore Rikhari

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