PEER PRESSURE EXISTS













“Hermits have no peer pressure.”
-       Steven Wright



Are  young ones influenced more by their peers than their parents?


Peer pressure exists!


Two nights ago, a mother of a 15-year-old girl, called me. The young one had just given her SSC Boards and now had a very long break before her (Almost four months). So, like many parents wish to do, this mother, too, wanted her young girl to do something productive during this long break. “Sir, I want her to do your PD programme,” she said, “Else, she will simply waste her days aimlessly.”


I briefed the mother about the programme. The young girl’s very close friend had already joined our programme. “She listens to her friends more than she listens to her parents,” the mother said, “But, what I am worried about is this: she doesn’t take decisions based on her own aspirations; she does what her friends want her to do. If they join, she joins; if they drop out, she drops out, too.”


Oh yes. The peer pressure exists, Sir. And, it has been there for eons. We parents, when young, had our own shares of peer pressure, too. Yes, we, often, followed our friends more than we followed our parents. Now, it’s our young ones’ turn! They have to complete their ‘peer-group trip’; and, I think, that’s perfectly okay; rather, it’s needed for a healthy growing-up experience!


The anxiety of parents has, always, been this: “What if the young ones get into some harmful habits?” “What if things go out of control?” “We must take charge before it is too late.” And so on…


And, I think, that, too, is perfectly okay; rather, it’s needed for a healthy growing-up experience of a parent!


“What if?” is a perennial anxiety of parenting… There is no permanent cure for it, except by learning to trust the benevolent Universe and making peace with Her ways…


The Universe has protected us and guided us… the parents. She will do the same for our young ones, too!


As our children grow in their own gardens, we, their parents and teachers, too, do in our own…


And, is that not something so beautiful?




GERALD D’CUNHA

Pic.: Niyothi Lobo

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