THE INK ON MY CONSCIENCE

“Bad politicians are elected by good people who don’t vote.” The conscience-keepers on social media always remind us – the ‘good people’ – before every election in our society. A fair-and-free election is the most important opportunity to bring about the change in governance. So, the right to vote is nothing short of the right to breathe. No matter how bad the situation looks outside, the ordinary citizens like you and me shouldn’t just sit at home and complain and curse… On the voting day, we all need to come out and vote…

I did for several years, and I did it during every election… be it the Corporation, the State Assembly or the Lok Sabha. Most importantly, I did it for myself… for my own good.

As it’s my a private matter, I have never discussed about who I voted for even in my own house. I haven’t flaunted my inked-finger ever on social media… I haven’t nudged anyone saying, “Go and vote” … not even my son. He is an adult, just as I am…

Why am I writing about all this, today?

As I said, I have religiously voted during all elections, for many years. Almost every time, I have done it early in the morning at the voting booth near our residence. The advantage of going to a voting centre early in the morning is, that it’s less crowded at that time. Besides, I am free to do other things during the rest of my day. But, my idealism had dimmed a lot during the latest Assembly elections in Maharashtra. I was almost disillusioned and least motivated to vote. Many times, I had voted for a party… Many times, keeping in mind the supreme leader at the Centre… and many times, just keeping in mind the local candidate I was voting for, irrespective of the party he belonged to. But, recently, when I saw the naked disregard of these elected candidates, once they were elected… the way they took us for granted, by literally selling their souls… yes, honestly, had left me disillusioned…

But, then, sitting at home and sulking was not the better option, either… It’s democracy and my right to vote was nothing short of my right to breathe. And, just as how my right to breathe comes with air-pollution, my right to vote, too, comes with system-pollution… I have no choice, but to breathe, but to vote!

I skipped my morning voting-routine, this time. Through the day, many asked me, “Did you vote?” ”Did you vote?” And, my reply was “Not yet.” Finally, as the day was coming to an end, I left, almost half-heartedly, so that I could have a clean conscience. I had barely moved a few steps from my office, when a local politician (who was known to me) saw me and shouted, “You haven’t still voted?”

People around looked at me as if I was a big-time sinner. This fellow, who had changed his party just before the Assembly elections, had his eagle’s eyes firmly fixed on my left-hand index finger, from such a long distance… All that he was interested in was the ink on my left-hand index-finger!

“I am going now,” I tried to save my face as I took longer and faster steps…

“What are you saying?” my conscience-keeper shouted again, “Only twenty minutes are left!”

He was right. I got caught up in the traffic for all those twenty minutes… and it’s all over…

I did not vote this time… after many, many years!

Am I feeling guilty?

I am still feeling disillusioned!

GERALD D’CUNHA

Pic.: www.opindia.com