THE HOME IS WITHIN US

 

“When things change inside you,

things change around you.”

Unknown

 

 

At hindsight, the very things, which I once thought were responsible for my inner turmoil, now seem are responsible for so many fine virtues, such as patience, empathy, resilience, forgiveness, self-reliance etc. Yes, many years ago, I thought the behaviour of others affected me, that they had to change their behaviour. But, as years passed by, slowly and steadily, wisdom came to settle in me…

Others behave as per their level of awareness and wisdom. I behave as per mine. There will, always, be this gap between our respective levels of awareness and wisdom…

So, what is easier? What’s within my hands?

“Peace be with you.” This is how the Priest reminds all of us towards the end of every mass in the church. Then, he reminds us to “Offer peace to each other.”

True… How can we offer peace to others unless and until we experience it within us?

Let me tell you this: We can experience peace in our hearts despite all the turmoil around us. Waiting for the turmoil to end – other people to change, behave properly – is simply asking for the Moon. As the quote says, “When things change inside us, things change around us.”

In my evening batch, yesterday, I saw a young girl struggling to write… “What’s wrong?” I asked the girl.

“Sir, I’ll tell you after the class,” the girl said with visible hesitance.

After everyone left the class, the girl stayed back to tell me what had happened. Apparently, she had a fight with her younger brother and thrown away his bag which had laptop in it. This provoked their mother to hit very hard on her daughter’s hand…

“Sir, I am afraid to go home,” the girl said sobbingly, “Father and mother are going to hit me even harder when I reach home.”

It had turned dark… I was aware of the constant frictions at home… The parents on one side, and this girl on the other. Parents had very low trust in their daughter, and the young daughter had trust absent, too. I had done my bit of counselling to this young girl, in my own way, several times before. I had, also, done the same with her parents.

“What you want me to do, now?” I asked the young girl.

“Sir, can you talk to them?”

“Well, I will talk. But, after that what? What if things flare up at home even more?” I knew, my talking to parents had to be done cautiously…

For the next fifteen minutes, I was on phone trying to tell girl’s mother, in my own way, that I had given enough advice to her young girl – that, if things change inside her, she will find change outside her. I gave the same advice the mother, “Ma’am, she a young girl… Don’t overreact… Work on your inner peace… Things will settle, eventually.”

Do they?

Yes, they do, always…

Outside the doors of our hearts, there shall, always, be turmoil. But, inside, we can still find peace…

The young girl need not feel scared to go home… She needs to check, deeply within, as to what can bring back peace inside her…

Mother and father, after all, have their own baggage… They, too, need to check deeply within, as to what can bring back peace inside them…

We all can go home peacefully…

The home is within us…

All roads lead us there…

 

GERALD D’CUNHA

 

Pic’s: Pixabay

 

Video: Andre Rieu