EVERY WORD FROM OTHERS NEED NOT HAVE A MEANING
“People are, often, illogical,
unreasonable and self-centered…
Love them anyway.”
Dr. Kent M. Keith
When
we say, ‘Humans are complex beings’, it includes all of us. If I think, others’
behaviour is, often, illogical, unreasonable and self-centered, others, by all probability,
would think the same way about my behaviour…
People are
thankless… Well, people say, I, too, am…
One of the toughest
things to do for me is to take things less personally – if not completely avoid
taking it so. My interpretations of others’ behaviour – their mood swings,
sulkings, reactions, words etc. – are the reasons why there are mood swings and
sulkings in me, too.
So, why someone
behaves towards me the way he/she does – well, the more I refrain from
interpreting and weaving stories around it, the better it is for my mental hygiene…
You see, I have
no control on others’ behaviour. Their mood swings, reactions, blame,
accusations – are not my creations; it’s their own…
Just as mine…
It’s a tough
lesson to learn… That, I am solely responsible for my own behaviour and
reactions, and others are for theirs…
This way, I
think, I will be able maintain my inner peace in the face of the illogical,
unreasonable and selfish behaviour of people around me. Yes, I can still love
them despite such a behaviour…
That’s the first
in the list of Dr. Kent M. Keith’s list of Paradoxical Commandments…
Reading too much,
and too early, into such a behaviour of people around us – particularly of
significant people in our lives – can get us into a painful trap of reactive
behaviour. It can drain our energy by making us sulk, react, argue… It can,
invariably, damage our self-confidence.
On the other
hand, when we let others’ behaviour be… never getting entangled, it can be such
a self-empowering behaviour from our end. Most of us learn this proactive behaviour
the hard way – after a thousand bruises on our hearts…
Love them anyway…
Do good to them any way… Bear gladly…
Every word hurled
at you need not have a meaning… Words can be just words…
I am learning,
the hard way, to bring in more self-care and more personal meaning into my own
behaviour…
Love is a great
Paradox, in deed…
GERALD D’CUNHA
Pic.: Pixabay
Videos: Dr. Kent M. Keith/Simerjeet Singh
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