FEELING CRUCIFIED BETWEEN TWO THIEVES

 



“If I am sincere today, what does it matter

if I regret it tomorrow?”

Jose Saramago Blindness

 

Yes Sir... The grass will always be greener on the other side of the fence. To that, we hear a correction: “No Sir... The grass will always be greener on the side where it is watered more and tended with more care.”

Amen...

No matter whichever side of the fence we all stand – married, unmarried, divorced and single, widowed and single... gay or straight... Live-in or live-out .... Employed or self-employed... yes, whichever side of the fence you and I stand, there is a deep desire in us to stretch our necks and look at the other side – “Oh, that side which is so greener!”

I am married for 34 years... Happily married?

Or, do I envy this thirty-five-year-old man, who answered with a mischief: “No, I am happy.”

I had asked him, “Are you married?”

It was some twenty-five years ago. I met him a week ago and repeated the old question: “I am still happy,” he answered with the same mischief...

But, this time, it was just after celebrating his silver wedding...

Happiness is a choice, Sir ji... The grass needs our constant attention – we need to continuously work to keep it greener...

Then, two days ago, I met this 51-year-old man, who I had taught in his T.Y. B.Com. He came from a simple family but was very determined to start a business of his own. More than three decades later, he said this to me: “But, Sir, when I look back at my decision, I seriously think, that I should have opted for a steady job.”

When I left his shop, I was asking myself this: “Do I regret for not taking up a steady job – with a regular, good salary, fixed holidays, retirement and medical benefits and all that, which, often, looks ‘greener’ on that side?”



I have fiends – doctors, chartered accountants, trainers, engineers, teachers, therapists, and many others – they are employed and are paid well, enjoy every benefit of a good job – but, they, too, are restless: “They want to start something of their own – they want to be their own bosses – they think, they will be ‘free’... ‘happy’... after that...

If only that’s true, Sir...

The grass will always be greener on the other side of the fence, no matter how hard someone tries to tell us, “No my friend, it’s greener only on the side which is watered more, and tended with more care.”

Robert Frost’s poem, when I learnt from my high-school textbook, was only that – an English poem which I had to swallow willy-nilly... But, today, when I go back to it, it is no longer a poem:

“I shall  be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I –

I took the one less travelled by,

And that has made all the difference.”


In life, regrets, too, are something we choose...





Looking back and regret, or look ahead and fear - yes Sir, the dilemma is dramatically captured by Fulton Oursler in his description:

“Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves:

regret for the past, and the fear of the future.” 


Remember the two thieves who were crucified on either side of Jesus Christ? One mocked Jesus, saying, “You said you’re Christ... Why can’t you now save yourself and save us, too?” The other thief pleaded: “Jesus, remember me when you come into your Kingdom.”

I wonder if Jesus Christ ended on the Cross with a regret!!!

 

GERALD D’CUNHA

 

Pic’s:  Pixabay 1. Jupilu  2. terski

Video: @himalayabungy

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