Gerald D'Cunha

  “The capacity to learn is a gift; the ability to learn is a skill; the willingness to learn is a choice.” — Brian Herbert   L earning shouldn’t stop. This means, we should be lifelong learners. But, then, there are thousands of things out there, which we won’t be able to learn… Did I say, “We won’t be able to learn”? Yes, I did… For, as Brian Herbert says, “The ability to learn is a skill.” And, skills need to be honed, developed, finetunes –- either on our own (self-develop, like Ekalavya did), or under some experts and trainers… What is interesting to note is, that our ability to learn (skill) is sandwiched between our capacity to learn (gift/talent) on one side, and our willingness to learn (choice) on the other… How interesting! Take swimming for example. I think, I am capable of learning it, and I am, certainly, able to learn it. But, if I have no willingness to learn it, it clearly tells, it is because I make that choice -- not to learn. This lu...

“I'm not always sincere. One can't be in this world, you know.”  ―  Greta Garbo T oday is Eid. While sending greetings to some of my Muslim friends, I became aware of the space from where my greetings came. Was I genuinely feeling for my friends or was I doing it mechanically just to be in their good books? I have no shame to admit this: many times, I wish on festivals, birthdays, anniversaries or some other achievements not because I genuinely feel for the person concerned… but, because, everybody else is doing it and I do not wish to be ‘misunderstood’ or in the ‘bad books’ of the person concerned… In other words, I just want to ‘please’! Well, not always though. Sometimes, many times! So, today, I paused before sending each Eid greetings and asked, “Where is it coming from?” “Am I genuinely feeling for the person?” “Am I rejoicing in his celebration?” “Are there some hidden strings attached to my greetin...

A round 11, last night, an uncle of mine called up. As we go off to sleep early these days, my uncle’s call had woken me up from my sleep. “Hello Gerry, we are in Goa on a short vacation,” my uncle said, “We are staying with a cousin of my wife. Their hospitality reminded me of you… I was telling them about you, and I just felt like saying a ‘Thank you’… Sorry for this late-hour call. But, I couldn’t hold it back!” Recently, my uncle and his wife had been to our hometown, Mangalore, after fifty-five years. His wife, a Goan, had never been to Mangalore. So, a few weeks ago, when I had to go with my family to attend my nephew’s wedding in Mangalore, my uncle expressed his desire to touch base… meet up with all his relatives and fulfill one of aunt’s wishes, too… Yes, before it was too late to do that (They are in their late seventies, you see.). Thus, I, along with my brothers, went an extra-mile to make this trip of our uncle and aunt a memorable experience for them...

Pic.: Avinash Mantri Y ears ago, when I had decided to do something about my poor English, one of the things I did – and found it very useful – was telling a nice story in two tenses… Past and Present. Over the years, I have helped hundreds of people who were earnest to improve their English with the same method… Yes, write a nice story down in both the tenses… and tell it to someone. The English phrase ‘Crocodile tears’   (false tears/ insincere display of emotion)   derives from an ancient belief that   crocodiles   shed   tears while consuming their prey. But, then, I would love to believe that our own popular Panchatantra-story has something to do with it… CROCODILE TEARS PAST: O n the banks of a river stood a huge mango tree. On the tree lived a monkey. A crocodile often came near the tree to eat the mangoes dropped by the monkey. The monkey and the crocodile became good friends. One day, the crocod...

Pic.:Anand Sreedhar Y esterday was a Sunday… Early in the morning, I learnt that it was a ‘Father’s Day’. The first thought that crossed my mind was very funny one: ‘Who decides all these days… Who prepares this ‘special calendar’?” My dad died in 1984… More than 30 years ago. I have written about him in so many of my blogs and spoken about him at so many places, that, for me, to post a blog on a Father’s Day wasn’t a task at all… Still, I did not write a word yesterday… I didn’t feel like. Did it make me a less deserving son of my late dad? I ncidentally, my 24-year-old ‘only son’ (who works in Pune) was here for a day. He had just returned after a two-week trip to Netherlands. He left for Pune at 7 in the evening, yesterday. We had long discussion through the day… and had spoken on many different issues. Interestingly, neither he had remembered to wish me ‘Happy Father’s Day’, nor was I expecting him to do that… Did it make my son a less des...

Pic.: Chetna Shetty O ver last few days, I have used this expression – ‘it comes from a clean space’ – many times and  at different places… Then, I suddenly paused to ask myself: “What is this clean space in us all about?” How am I supposed to know that an act or statement comes from a clean space within me? Giving, loving, caring, helping, mentoring, serving, teaching, working and everything else come from a source… When I care for someone, for example… or when I say something about someone… yes, I can sense inside me as to how I feel about my act of caring or the words I am saying… When I compliment or thank someone, I can sense how I feel it… When I mentor or help someone, I can sense how I feel inside… If it comes from a clean space, I invariably feel good about myself… There is no premeditation, no expectation from other person… I act with no strings attached… I love and care, for that’s what my heart says I should do… I compliment and thank because,...

Pic. : Alwyn Mathias “Be the type of person you want to meet.” -Anonymous T he first impression is the last impression. While a major part of it may be true, I don’t think, any first impression – no matter how good or bad it is – can be ‘the last’ impression. And, because, somewhere it is ingrained into our psyche, that our first impression is very, very important – that, it is the ultimate, the decisive, the final impression, we go overboard to present our best profile before the world… Yes, I, too, do it… Take me anywhere… Put me before anyone – right from my new students to their parents… to a bank manager, government official, or even a new neighbor or friend… Yes, somewhere at the back of my mind, it is deeply seated: that, I must leave my best impression before them! So, I do… And, I am sure, like me, everyone else does, too. But, then, I am in touch with another thought in my mind, which, invariably, pops up every time I try ...

Pic.: Anand Ashokan “Courtesy is the one coin you can never have too much of or be stingy with.” - John Wanamaker   A couple of days ago, Ekta, a dear student of mine, who presently pursues MBA through a reputed institution in Mumbai , had posted a picture: “She is holding ma hand, you see!” Ekta had given the caption, filled with pride and excitement... The present Union HRD-minister, Ms. Smriti Irani, had visited Ekta’s college. The picture captured the moment when Ms. Irani had held Ekta’s hand as she was stepping out of the car. “Ekta, please don’t wash that hand... yes, till you hold mine!  What say????” I sent my teaser to Ekta, indicating that it was a precious moment, and she had to cherish it for a long, long time. “Till you hold mine” was to convey that I, too, being Ms. Irani’s great admirer, would love to feel the fragrance of her hand, of course, via Ekta’s hand! “Hehe...Okay sir....not yet washed m comin sir...”...

Pic.: Neerja Panchal T here are a hundred reasons why I admire and adore Mahatma Gandhi. Like the life of Jesus Christ, the life of Gandhi inspires me, empowers me. Heart is where God dwells. Both, Christ and Gandhi heavily emphasized on the power of love that comes from our hearts. Both taught: Love is   prayer in action!” Today is Gandhi Jayanti. I thought, I would write a short piece on something, that, at this moment, compels me to think of my Hero… and, I found one of his lines, which had, always, made a lot of sense to me: “Prayer is not asking. It is a longing of the soul. It is daily admission of one's weakness. It is better in prayer to have a heart without words than words without a heart.” When our  hearts long constantly… When we sincerely admit, and submit, our human weaknesses before God, that’s our real prayer. Yes, our hearts deeply long… deeply acknowledge their weaknesses… ...