Friday, March 19, 2010

THE ANGER AND SORROW

 The man who shot dead the young XI th standard student, yesterday, was a senior citizen, a retired customs officer. The girl was not a party to his anger... she did not belong to the family with whom he had picked his fight... she did not even stay there. Still, he shot her down.

What was his anger? His reason to kill?

He was angry, because of the civil work being carried out at the flat above his own. The work disturbed him... so much... yes so much that it made him pull his revolver and create a ruckus at the society premises... and, finally, kill that innocent stranger-girl.

The cops gunned him down, soon after that!

It is the death of anger... The end of ego. May the innocent and the ignorant, both, rest in peace.

Cops did not gun down Pravin Mahajan, even though he shot dead, in broad daylight, his own brother, his mentor - Pramod Mahajan.

What was his reason? His provocation?

Whatever they may be, Pravin Mahajan did not think he did anything wrong by gunning down his brother. He did not repent, regret... He remained in the prison... sentensed to life... He chose to be there, but he would not feel remorseful.

But, did Pravin Mahajan, actually, not feel sorry, feel bad for his act?

I think, Pravin Mahajan definitely must have felt bad, sorry. It is only that he was unable to gather courage to admit it in open. He must have battled this dilemma, this ghost within... pretending to be brave and self-sure... but, only to be crushed by the brain hemorrhage...then go into a never-to-return coma and, finally, succumb to death.

I seriously feel, had Pravin Mahajan openly, and sincerely, expressed his regret, his sorrow over his emotional act - the act of insanity - he would have survived... died a honorable man.

I also feel the same way about some members of Pramod Mahajan's family. They should have openly and sincerely forgiven Pravin. But, they held on to their anger, their sorrow, and their loss.

When anger and sorrow come together, it becomes poison. It makes some kill with their guns... and it makes some kill themselves.

Sin is a label. If I sin, it only means I have fallen from grace for a while... but not forever. I am not condemned to the permanent fire of hell. Every time I sin, fall from grace, I have an opportunity to come closer to God. I consider, sin is the passage I need to walk through before I can come closer to the gates of heaven.

I pray to God to give strength to that little girl's family. Lord, help them to forgive. I also pray to God to give strength to the widow of that custom officer. Lord, help her deal with her pain. Finally, the one's whose civil work had made that man go mad. Lord, help them to feel bad. Please keep Your gates open for all of them.


GERALD D'CUNHA

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