If I had gone to bed, last night, with thoughts of fear concealed in my heart, how could I rise, this morning, feeling confident, courageous? Likewise, if I had ended my night with a hundred complaints tucked under my heart, how could I expect to see a bright Sun outside, this morning?
When I first heard someone making this statement - "The greatest miracle you have witnessed, today, is the fact that you woke up this morning... that, you are alive, now!" , I had, instantly, loved it, felt inspired by it. Just to think, and feel deeply, that I had that privilege, that grace, is, truly, humbling. It is, truly, a spiritual experience. I completely believe, that, if I am capable of going through such a profound experience, I do not need to offer any more prayer. That feeling, that experience, itself is a true prayer. Whether I kneel down or raise my hands unto the heavens, whether I garland my Deity or chant before Him... I think, all this is immaterial. I just need to feel, deeply and truly, that I had this privilege, this grace... that, 'Some one' bestowed mercy on me... granted me one more day... one more chance.
Yes, I woke up this morning... I am alive, now! Yes, as I write this piece, I can feel the profundity of this statement; I can experience that touch of grace, that breath of mercy.
But, it doesn't happen all the time... in fact, most of the time. Most of the time, I retire, at night, feeling scared and anxious... feeling resentful, angry or sorrowful. I try to close my eyes with lots of self-pity or blame. And, obviously, when I rise, the next morning, I see the harvest of my seeds. Why am I not able to see this simple connection, this simple truth, so often? It is a great puzzle for me.
Life becomes easy, less complicated, when the gap between 'what I know' and 'what I do' becomes less and less... When there is internal integrity. Peace, that inner silence, comes with it... effortlessly.
So, this morning, when I am able to go through that less frequent experience of peace, I am able to experience, also, a prayerful state in my heart. I see myself saying, again and again and again - "Lord, thank you for showing mercy on me." Moments like these, help me realise the difference between the two prayers: "Lord, have mercy on me," and "Lord, thank you for showing mercy on me."
That realisation, too, is a miracle. Thank you, Lord.