Gerald D'Cunha

Some, who have not seen my emotionally vulnerable side – my intense outbursts of anger, frustration, sadness, insecurity and arrogance – assume that I am a very cool and composed individual - a mature soul…   Like one of our ‘Babas’ around! And, therefore, on an inauspicious day, if these people get to witness my volatile avatar, their reaction could be one of these two: “Hey, what a let down!” Or, “Hey, he is just like us!” I am just like you; and, you are just like me… What a wonderful thought that is! That, the veins in my body carry the same red-blood… and they throb with the same precious life… The fear in my mind and the love in my heart can be as crippling and as comforting as they can be for you… I love tenderness of heart, just as you do… I fold my hands before my elders, just as you do before yours… I kneel before my God, just as you do before yours… A good story gives me goose-pimples, just as it does t...

We are educated people, decent ones… very respected ones, too! A friend of mine lost his mother today… I just returned from the cremation place. The friend of mine, whose mother had been suffering from cancer for sometime now, was shattered… His elderly dad was sitting across the Priest to perform the last rites. We were there maybe for half-an-hour or so… and, within that time-span, we saw five more deceased being brought in… Some young, some old. The people who matter at that spot are Priests, the ambulance guy, the guy who is in charge of wood, the pyre, the one who keeps the record… These guys are too simple ones. But, here, they are the ones who matter… You, very obediently – blindly – do what the Priest asks you to do. You are a fool if you ask questions! When, the ambulance fellow doesn’t come on time, it leaves you tensed… You don’t know how to go about the whole process… whom to contact, what things are required… You realize h...

In Life, some things we, always, do without being told… and, without any concern over time or returns… even, appreciation. We, always, pursue them just for the simple joy they give us… and, we do them with our full heart. They are our hobbies. Call them interests… It makes no difference. Normally, any pursuit ‘outside my regular occupation’ is considered to be our hobby. So, my regular occupation is teaching ‘commerce students’. If I do any activity, other than teaching, through my own self-interest, for sheer joy… like this blogging, counseling, poetry, writing notes in dairies, or photography, painting, sports – or, yes, the FB ‘time-pass’– all these can be branded as hobbies. Some of my friends still collect old coins and stamps… Some have hundreds of mini-car models… Some keep fish and tortoise at home, some dogs and parrots… Some maintain gardens and plants… Some cook exotic dishes, some sing, some sketch… Some collect celebrity autog...

“What will people think?” For many of us, this is the biggest fear… The heaviest burden!   Now, I hear some saying, “No, I care a damn to what people think.” I can only smile when I hear that! The father of a young-girl was there in my office, this morning. The girl, who currently is in FY B’Com, had cleared her CPT (CA entrance-exam) smoothly and had joined a reputed coaching-class for preparing for the IPCC exams (Inter-CA exams). Along the way, the pressures had gotten the better off of this girl, health had deteriorated and she couldn’t attend the coaching. The parents advised the girl to take good rest, focus on her college exams and just enjoy her college life, presently… They were very supportive and told her that there was no hurry at all to complete her CA; that, she could give exams, gradually in installments, as and when she felt she was able and ready. The girl was just in her 3 rd standard when...

Mike Tyson is completely a changed man! Yes, this once mean, mad and unpredictable man… Heartless Cannibal would be more appropriate! A couple of days back, I saw this picture of Tyson tightly hugging Evander Holyfield… When I saw the closed eyes and childlike smile on Tyson’s face, I called my wife and said, “Look at this… Can you believe this? Sixteen years ago, in the boxing ring at Las Vegas, they were locked in a boxing-hug – a blood-soaked, merciless and devastating one – and, this very man, Mike Tyson, had eaten off Holyfield’s ear!” Sixteen years looked like an eternity! Now, this hug evoked in me the softness of a baby cradle, the hope of God’s heaven… Where the Past, as they say, is just a history… the Future is an awe-filled mystery… and   the Present is an amazing gift as this baby-hug is… To come to terms with your bloody, reckless past… To be hopeful and trusting as a wonder-struck little-child about your future… and, ...

“Our deepest fears are like dragons guarding our deepest treasures.” –         Rainer Maria Rilke When my thoughts come, they just come. They neither seek my permission before they come, nor before they leave. Like clouds in the sky, they come… wearing   a hundred different hues… stay as long as they wish… and, then, they go… only to visit again… then go, come, go, come… over and over again! Like clouds wearing a hundred different hues, I said… They are my happy thoughts, sad thoughts, thoughts of love and insecurity, thoughts of courage and fear… Hope and despair, hatred and compassion… All kinds of thoughts visit me, a thousand times a day… when I am awake and asleep… when I am working and resting… when I am alone and in company… when I am young and old… Yes, they visit me all the time, all my life… So, what am I supposed to do with them – these ‘peculiar’ visitors...

Is it important for parents to tell their children – little-ones or young-ones - where they (parents) go and when they will be back home? What about the children? Is it important for them to tell their parents where they go and when they will be back home? I am a parent – a father of a young son. Let’s assume, as I am his father, I did not think it was important at all to tell my son, and he always saw me leaving home without telling where I went or when I would be back – how would he think it is important for him to do it every time he left home? Now, normally, people at my home know where I am headed – my workplace. But, if, during the day, I have a different agenda, a different destination to visit, then, I think it is important I let them know about it… The idea is: we never know what may happen to us outside - when, where and how! So, I emphasize: It ‘is’ important for me as a father to let my young son know, where I wil...

A friend of mine was here in my office, this morning. He is a young medical-practitioner and involved with many social causes, particularly education. For last couple of years, he has been a very active Trustee of one of the well-known and old educational institutions. Incidentally, he is its youngest Trustee and is surrounded there by old, experienced and very committed Trustees. This morning, my friend happened to share with me two mundane incidences involving their President, who is in his late eighties. The first incident. The institute had organized a grand function to felicitate this elderly soul for his decades of selfless service to the institution in particular, and to the Society at large. During this function, the organizers had presented this senior gentleman with a stunning statue of pure silver. It was quite a big statue and had cost a big sum, too. After the function, while leaving the campus, he expressed his appreciation and ...

There is an old Chinese proverb: “Of all the war strategies, to know when to quit is the best.” Now, read it again… It says ‘When to quit’… and, not ‘How to quit’. We hail young Abhimanyu as a brave warrior. According to the legend, he learnt about the warfare of Chakravyuh – its formation, how to get into it and penetrate it - while he was still in his mother Subhadra’s womb! Arjuna, his father, would discuss about this war secret with his wife and the unborn Abhimanyu would learn it so early… Yes, that’s how the legend goes. However, as Arjuna had to leave, he could not complete the most important part of the warfare of Chakravyuh: How to quit it. So, when it was time, the young-warrior, Abhimanyu, enters the Labyrinth brilliantly… But, alas, only to get ambushed by his enemies inside! Ever since this great battle of Mahabharata, we have come to believe that to win Life’s battles, we need to know not only how to enter our ...

The famous phrase ‘Udipi Hotels’ has come from the temple town of Udipi in the Dakshina Kannada district of Karnataka. But, the dynamic men, who run these famous signature hotels all over the world, are not necessarily from Udipi. Nor are they from its cousin-city, Mangalore… No, not necessarily. You talk to these men and they will tell you that they come from the interior villages around Mangalore and Udipi… Yes, small, simple villages. Probe these men a little further, and you will be surprised as to how similar their stories are: almost all of them had begun from scratch. When they were small boys, someone – an Hotelier from Mumbai or similar big city – had picked them up from their villages and brought them to the big cities to serve water or clean tables. Lucky ones might start directly as waiters… but, rarely someone would start as a cashier… Leave alone as a manager. The small boys soon become big boys… they work so hard, so loyally and wit...