CAN LIFE BE LIVED WITHOUT ATTACHMENTS?








Often, Jiddu Krishnamurti used to say, “Fear exists only in relationships.” I had heard that before from other teachers, too… when they said, that fear stemmed from our attachments. As a young man, I would appreciate the deep meaning of this wisdom. However, like the vast majority around me, I would find it extremely difficult to go about my life by detaching myself from the world around me…

The world around me included my nearest and dearest ones… my friends and relatives… my associates and neighbors… my community people - religious, political, social - etc. Well, my world was not made up of only people… It included all my possessions… my dreams, beliefs, ideas, opinions, even feelings… Yes, as a young man – why as a young man, I want to say as a human being on this planet – I would wonder whether it was possible for anyone to live life without creating around him this web called ‘relationships’.

The very post that I am now writing is a clear proof for what I am saying… It is coming from my desires and dreams, my ideas and beliefs… It is coming from my yearning to be recognized, appreciated, admired, respected and validated. Am I not confessing to a truth? So, the battle inside has, always, been this: “Can life be lived without attachments… without relationships?”     

Well, I don’t think we need an enlightened soul to give an answer to this…

What I have gathered is: Everything I aspire to have in my life makes my life worth living. But, when I see my life getting too complicated on possessing those things – people, properties, ideas, beliefs and all – yes, that is when I should examine the nature of my attachments…

Any attachment!

Any!

In response to my last Blog – ‘THE LIFE THAT IS WAITING FOR US’ – a dear friend of mine, who lives abroad, wrote to me this:

Hi Gerry, I let out a big sigh as I read this… I had just connected with a very dear friend of mine who shared with me that her marriage of 24-plus years had ended… I was heartbroken at the news as I had known the couple since they were dating in their early teens. It seemed like a match made in heaven...  one of those couples who had so much love for each other to last more than a lifetime. I got no details of why it had ended… I did not need any details. My friend, however, seemed to have sadness, but the attitude that "Lessons have been learned, we both have to move on". I was amazed at her maturity and grace. A few hours later, I saw this post and I feel encouraged… I shared your post with my friend. Great timing for the message in your post! Thank you.


Henley who said, “I am the master of my fate… I am the captain of my soul’… yes, he had to let go of his ‘infected’ leg so that he could live a more productive and purposeful life. For you and me, it could be anything that is ‘infected’…

Letting go is the most potent spiritual exercise…

I know, like you, I, too, am limping!


GERALD D’CUNHA


Pic.: Chetna Shetty

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