WHY SHOULD I BE APOLOGETIC ABOUT SELF-CARE?

















“The world won't get more or less terrible
if we're indoors somewhere with a mug of hot chocolate.”
― Kamila Shamsie, Burnt Shadows

I have not blogged for ten days now. “That’s okay,” I keep reminding myself… After all, do I owe anyone any explanation? Why should I be apologetic about it?

Well, I am not trying to reason out. I really do not have to explain anyone anything for the simple reason that nobody’s life depends on reading my blog.

In life, we assume so many things. One of them is: the world needs us… our work, our service, our help and so on. But, the bare truth is: the world can very well function without our active role in it. Simple.

So, time to time, I consciously abstain from doing what I am passionate about, including my daily blog. It is a spiritual exercise… just like fasting.

Meanwhile, I was occupied with putting together my next book to be published on 4th February, 2017. It will be a book on health and well-being. I have chosen around 40 of my blog posts for this book. Just this morning, I added a small piece to it. Here it is:

SELF-CARE
A large part of stress in my life has come from my inability to say ‘No’, when I needed to. Saying ‘Yes’ when we want to say ‘No’ does not come from a healthy self-esteem… To me, it has been a never-ending lesson… That is, to understand the difference between ‘selfishness’ and ‘self-care’…

Unless, I stand for myself, I can never stand for anyone else in my life. And, if I do, I end up doing only harm to my own self!

Another source of my stress has always come - as Byron Katie tells in her book, ‘Loving What Is’ – when I have focused on someone else’s or God’s business. Stephen Covey imparted the same lesson as: focusing on the Circle of our Influence (which is within our power) and the Circle of our Concern (which is outside our power). The lesson to me, therefore, has been… to constantly learn to focus on my own business… the circle of influence over which I truly have control.

It has not been easy to bring about the shift… as I predominantly operate from my heart and emotions. But, then, that’s what it is… and, that’s where I will be… if I do not grow up in the area of emotional maturity…

Self-care. My health and well-being stand on this robust pillar.

GERALD D’CUNHA

Pic.: Chetna Shetty

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