AS BEAUTIFUL AS I WANT IT TO BE...












Many a times, I wonder as to why, at one time, I am willing to accept and accommodate another person in spite of his or her huge flaws… and, why, at another time, I am put off by his or her very minor blunders! 


Yes, I do find in me the strength, grace and space to accommodate the other person’s flaws, when I am overwhelmed by what is good and special in him. When I choose to see – acknowledge, honor, respect and celebrate – what is good and special in him, nothing else seems to matter. My mind drops its judging, my eyes overlook the ugly side, and my heart simply rejoices the presence of another fellow-traveler along my life.


Let me tell you this: when I choose, consciously, to acknowledge, honor and celebrate the specialness in other person, a silence comes to reside in my heart… It is peace… It is an amazing experience. It makes me feel safe, secure and loved… It makes me feel worthwhile, confident and rich!


On the other hand, when I am overpowered by another choice, that is, when I choose to overlook the goodness and specialness of the other person and keep harping on the flaws – what is missing, what is not there – my heart turns into a living hell. It is turmoil… a disturbing experience. It makes me feel unsafe, insecure and unloved… and, yes, it makes me feel worthless, diffident and wretched. 


Though I, often, wonder about these two diametrically opposite movements within my heart, I am happy that there is also a deep awareness saving me from going completely cynical in life. I am aware that, my reaction to the other person’s minor flaws is essentially caused my own inability to come to terms with my past experiences - real or perceived - with that person. That, when I allow myself to be dictated by my unresolved  and unpleasant past experiences – then, it is extremely difficult for me to see the present reality – no matter how pleasant and how real it is now… It is difficult to acknowledge, honor and celebrate the pleasantness of the present reality. Yes, instead of basking under the glory of the present Sun, I end up sulking under the eerie gloom of a Moonless night!


Awareness is the grace of God…


It is the saving grace!











The mystery of the two movements within man’s soul is an age-old mystery… Yes, it an age-old battle between the Good and the Evil. And yes, if the Good has to triumph, then, my soul has to really, really yearn for it. My intention has to be incredibly good… I must, really, really wish good for the other person as much as I do for my own self…


Mind is weak, often. It succumbs to the temptation of playing games… The games, which, in the end, only leave us more wounded, resentful and disturbed... diffident and wretched. When my heart is able to see this fallible side of my mind, the awareness comes to my rescue… 


The goodness wins…




In life, 


I have no ‘issues’… 


unless I ‘want’ them!





The sky looks as beautiful as my heart want it to be!




GERALD D’CUNHA

Pics.: Raj Dhage Wai





Comments

SEEMA REDDY said…
Great post sir!!! Seema
September 12, 2012 at 12:49 PM
Rishi Narang said…
Absolutely a masterpiece! Thanx a ton Gerry.

Rishi
September 12, 2012 at 12:50 PM
Anonymous said…
yes, I am aware of this movement within me. Very familiar, in deed. Thanks for this amazing post. Kavita
September 12, 2012 at 1:55 PM
GEETA BHAT said…
A very beautiful and motivating article. Geeta
September 12, 2012 at 8:37 PM
Gerald D'Cunha said…
Thanks Seema. Love, GERRY
September 13, 2012 at 8:40 AM
Gerald D'Cunha said…
Thanks Geeta, Love. GERRY
September 13, 2012 at 8:40 AM
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