WHEN THERE IS NO REMEDY FOR THE 'PAIN IN MY NECK'...
Pic.: Rajiv Sharma
In life,
the lesser I resist, the better for me!
And, it applies to, almost, every situation and person in
my life... whose presence has become what, in my frustration, I, often, yell
out as - ‘a pain in my neck’!
Nobody - or nothing - in my life can become a pain in my
neck, unless I allow him or it to be!
Yes, people can not eat my head... I allow them to!
Situation in life can not destroy my peace... I allow them
to!
When someone behaves the way I don’t like, I can tell him about
it in a dozen different ways... But, in spite of my telling, if his behavior
doesn't change, my reaction to it, should. Else, he will continue to dwell in
my head as my perennial tormentor, make my head constantly spin... and, most
certainly, he will end up becoming that nasty pain in my neck. Or, wherever it
is!
The troubles in our lives, too, may come uninvited. And,
who, in his senses, wants them? Yes, when troubles come, our natural instinct
is to resist their entry... try all possible means to banish them from our
lives. With some, we succeed; and, with some, we don’t. The key to our peace of
mind lies exactly here:
What do we do when some of our so-called troubles don’t go
away?
Do we resist them more - curse them, scream at them, throw
things around... blame, accuse, and swear... yes, everything that an obsessed person would do?
Or, do we accept them – welcome them, embrace them... so
that they dissolve, melt away, keeping us free from their bondage, free from
being victimized, traumatized or crippled?
Carl Jung’s
famous statement, “What you resist, persists; what you embrace, dissolves,” doesn’t
tell us to simply lie down and allow people and situations to walk over us,
rule our peace of mind. Far from it. A
proactive person – call him sensible person, if you like – will, first, try his
best to change all the undesired situations and behavior of people in his life.
But, not beyond that proverbial ‘wisdom point’ made famous by the Serenity Prayer:
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
If there’s a remedy when trouble strikes,
What reason is there for dejection?
And if there is no help for it,
What use is there in being glum?
So, my dear friend, today, if your
wisdom tells you, that there is no remedy - yes, for your ‘pain in the neck' - please say ‘Amen’... So be it!
GERALD D’CUNHA
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--- Gaurav V