FEELING FOR THE TOUGH TIMES

 

“Tough times don’t define you, they refine you.”

Carlos A Rodriguez

“What Pandemic?”

I think, around us, today, there are two kinds of people… The first kind, who are heard saying – “It’s pandemic”. The second kind, who are heard asking – “What pandemic?”

‘Tough Times Never Last, But Tough People Do.' This was the title of one of the most popular and motivational books of eighties. It was the time, newly arrived in this city, I was trying to understand how people defied their deprived condition and succeeded. Napoleon Hill, Dale Carnegie and Norman Vincent Peale, undoubtedly, dominated my mind-space in understanding the success mind-set. ‘Positive thinking’! But, it was Dr. Robert Schuller’s book that got me introduced to the philosophy of ‘Possibility Thinking’… In short, the ‘practical positive thinking’…

Whatever, whatever… We all know, that most of the rags-to-riches heroes, who we try to emulate, hadn’t – and haven’t – read any of those motivational books. That will be so in the future, too. The folks like me do… We try to ‘read and grow’, ‘think and grow’…

But, we only grow when we ‘feel’… when we ‘do’!

So, every kid who grew up in times of The Great Depression, The Great Plagues or The Great Wars, hasn’t ‘felt’ the situation or hasn’t ‘done’ what he or she should have… “Times are tough” … “What tough?” The two kinds of people always walked upon this earth!

Tough times are ‘tough’ only when we ‘feel’ the toughness. Else, tough times are never tough… They never motivate us.

This gentleman has two sons. The elder son has just joined an MBA programme after his Engineering degree; the younger one has just taken admission for first year of graduation. The father, who works for a large organization and has only two more years to retire, is the only earning member in the family. I had taught the younger son during his Junior-college years. Now, the father wanted me to teach the younger son in his first-year studies and the elder son in his first-year MBA studies (in Accounting subjects). I started teaching both even before the admission formalities (Fees) were completed. I was very happy the way the two sons responded to my teaching. After a week or so, the elder son called me to say, that he would not be able to continue due to ‘time adjustment’. He confessed, that he loved my teaching, but, due to ‘time adjustment’, he was sorry to quit. I had this feeling in my heart, that the reason must be ‘Money adjustment’ and not ‘Time adjustment’…

I was right. Yesterday, the father had called me to complete the admission formalities of the younger son. We spoke cordially for nearly thirty minutes… During this conversation, he opened up… He told me about his 40% pay-cut… The fear of lay-off looming large… The anxiety over servicing the education loan which he had just borrowed for his elder son’s MBA programme… The anxiety over not having a house of their own even at this age… and, the conversations at home with his wife: “Let’s manage without our maid” … "Let’s eat one roti less; but, let’s not compromise on our sons’ education” … and so on…

The father told me, yesterday, that his elder son had overheard these conversations between his parents, and, quietly called me to say, “Sir, allow me to quit.”

My gut-feeling was right.

The father said, “Before quitting, my son was contemplating on requesting you to teach him now, and he would pay you once he was employed after his MBA. But, maybe, he couldn’t gather enough courage to express that.”

These are some man-making moments for me in my life. I have had my own days of ‘feeling for the tough times’. I, instantly, spoke to the older boy and said, “Beta. you just attend my classes and forget about everything else.” He was a lot shy and embarrassed, first. But, I tried my best not to allow the embarrassment to take the better of him… So, the boy is in my fold, now!     

Yes, Sir. I do think, around us, today, there are two kinds of people… The first kind, who are heard saying - ‘It’s pandemic’. The second kind, who are heard asking – “What pandemic?”

 

GERALD D’CUNHA

 

Pic's: pixabay

 

Video: Josh Groban