THE RULE AND THE RESPECT
















We are educated people, decent ones… very respected ones, too!

A friend of mine lost his mother today… I just returned from the cremation place.

The friend of mine, whose mother had been suffering from cancer for sometime now, was shattered… His elderly dad was sitting across the Priest to perform the last rites. We were there maybe for half-an-hour or so… and, within that time-span, we saw five more deceased being brought in… Some young, some old.

The people who matter at that spot are Priests, the ambulance guy, the guy who is in charge of wood, the pyre, the one who keeps the record… These guys are too simple ones. But, here, they are the ones who matter… You, very obediently – blindly – do what the Priest asks you to do. You are a fool if you ask questions!

When, the ambulance fellow doesn’t come on time, it leaves you tensed…

You don’t know how to go about the whole process… whom to contact, what things are required…

You realize how important it is to have someone well-versed with all such things…

The man in khaki tells you, coldblooded: “If there is no doctor’s certificate, I will not allow the body to go up the pyre!”

Yes, it is a rule.

There is some confusion… The certificate is expected in a while… You are a decent guy – a gentleman… You are highly qualified, hold a high post in a company… and you are highly respected… True, true. But, here is the ground reality… The man in khaki holds the key to your peace. “I won’t allow,” he tells you bluntly…

It is a grief-stricken ambiance… Home people can’t think clearly in times like this… You only wish someone behaved kindly with you… Yes, not so bluntly, not so heartlessly.

Without the doctor’s certificate, the cremation will not take place… It is a rule…

Fair enough. No one is telling you to break the rule… Only they are requesting you to allow the cremation to take place, for now, for everyone’s convenience… till the ‘piece of paper’ arrives… Maybe, in an hour…

But, the man in khaki harps about the ‘rule’…

There is someone who knows how to ‘follow’ such rules. He calms the stickler-to-rules down, says something sweetly into his ears… and, behold! Suddenly, everything seems ‘okay’… The ‘rule’ obeyed… The permission granted!

Rest of the ceremony goes very smoothly…

There is peace, all around…

You, my friend and I are all very educated, very decent and very respected people – Gentlemen of the first order! But, here, at this spot, we have to cast all that into the burning pyre… We need to know who matters, where and why… 




We need to know what the ‘rules’ are… 

when to ‘respect’ them… how and why!



And, we need to remember this, too: In Life, there are times, when it is neither sensible nor decent to ask any questions…

Just mellow with the pyre that dies down!

GERALD D’CUNHA

Pic.: Amrita Jeurkar




Comments

Sunil Hegde said…
Humbled me. Thank you... Sunil
February 25, 2013 at 8:16 PM
Lalit Nayak said…
True, we need such experiences to keep us grounded in life.
- Lalit
February 26, 2013 at 6:15 PM
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