WE ARE WORTHY... NOT BECAUSE OTHERS THINK SO

 

 Pic.: Neetu Sharma Sachdeva

On Sunday-night KBC-show, there was this contestant. His two bright-brothers were college professors, and this married young-man, who wasn’t as good in studies as his two brothers were, ended up running a small mobile-store. Obviously, there was constant criticism and comparison with the two-well-educated and well-respected brothers, which had instilled a nagging feeling of worthlessness in him. So, our man was now hell-bent in proving his worth, proving before the world that he wasn’t a worthless fellow… Yes, he confessed to Amitabh Bachchan, the charismatic host of the show, that it was the major motivation for his KBC pursuit.

Amitabh, known for his encouragement and magnanimity, kept reminding our young man that he should not feel inferior to anyone, including his two well-educated brothers… that, he should drop the feeling of worthlessness… that, despite their high education and respectful positions in life, his two brothers weren’t able to make it to the coveted Hot-seat of KBC… while he (our man) could… “You possess within you all the potential,” the great Amitabh Bachchan pepped the contestant graciously, “You are not worthless… You are a ‘Somebody’ and not a ‘Nobody’...”

“If Amitabh Bachchanji thinks so,” responded our contestant, “then, I must believe that I am a worthwhile fellow.”

“No, not because I think so,” Amitabh tried to remind our contestant, “but, because, you think so.”

Now, this was the broad summary of the conversation on the show… not the actual dialogues… The moral of the story is not distorted:

“My young friend, believe in yourself… Not in another person’s verdict on you. The only person, to whom you have to prove your worth is – is YOU!”

I loved this conversation. The only verdict on our worthiness has to come from within our hearts. We are worthwhile not because someone we look up to thinks so… Nor are we worthless because he thinks so…

In life, we do look up to our parents and grandparents, brothers, sisters and relatives, teachers, bosses and well-wishers… And, along with that comes our susceptibility to their assessment and verdicts on our worthiness… So, unless we realize how much our well-being depends on the extent we have allowed others’ evaluation of us to swing our trust in ourselves… yes, it shall, always, be like a seesaw: at the mercy of people, who we have allowed to ‘sit on us’... on two sides of our hearts…

Amitabh was reminding the young-man: “Neither your two brothers… Nor I should instill confidence in you… Only you should!”

And, it is not good for our confidence, 

if we go on proving to others how worthy we are…

That’s a bottomless pit… It will only add more agony, more frustration in our hearts…

GERALD D’CUNHA