BEING USEFUL NOT JUST IN LIFE, BUT IN DEATH, TOO






Pic.: Elaine Pereira

I knew a man who had made some easy-money. He suffered from an acute inferiority complex, which he tried to cover-up by going overboard trying to please and impress people around him, particularly, the ones who, he thought, came from educated, well-off and respected families. He had come from obscure background with no education or even ethics... made some big-money taking short-cuts, bought many properties including many fine cars... But, at the end of the day, it did not make him feel, inside, good at all... What he, really craved for was respect from people around him, who he thought were ‘good’ people... But, what he failed to realize was, that he could not win their trust through the route he had chosen to – by showing off his wealth and misplaced sophistication.

I remember him taking some of us to his residence to show his 60”-TV when Plasma TV had just come in... showing us, with pride, the Ganesh idol made of pure gold... talking about the properties and cars he possessed, the gold his wife wore and, even, the amount of money he had spent to install aesthetic teeth-set in his mouth made of pure gold!

Yes, the man did all this for one thing: to get accepted by us – the ones, he thought, were respected in the Society... All that he wanted was a validation from us!

Poor soul! When he died, some years later, I was there by the funeral pyre... as his body - including the ‘golden-teeth’ - was reduced to ashes!

He could never win our hearts; he could never go with a true sense of being accepted and validated... His property, cars and gold served none, least of all himself... They failed to fill in him the sense of being useful... either in life or in death!


And, just a week ago, when 57-year-old Mrs. Kavita Karkare (The widow of 26/11 martyr, Hemant Karkare) died, she ended up giving life to many strangers around... Her liver would save the life of a 48-year-old patient from Kokilaben Ambani Hospital; one of her kidneys would save life of a 59-year-old patient from Jaslok and another kidney would do it for a 48-year-old patient from Hinduja... Her two eyes would give sight to patients through Haji Bachooali Eye Bank!

This woman, and her three young-children, won not just my heart but millions of other other hearts, too, all over the world. It was a quiet, dignified and respectful act – and, it needed validation from none around the grieving family. By one honest act, they left us a lot moved, humbled and inspired...

“One can be useful to people around not just in life, but, in death, too!” I could hear me saying, as I saw myself, in my heart, standing by Mrs. Karkare’s pyre, “You have my 21-gun-salutes ma’am!”



GERALD D’CUNHA


Comments

Burman D said…
What we cant do in life, Mrs. Karkare did in her death! ... Burman

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