WHEN WE ARE LOST IN LIFE

One of the mightiest breakthroughs in our lives comes when we find ourselves. 

I am talking about, here, about our vocation – our calling – in life.

Scores of parents keep complaining about their young-ones: “Sir, he has no interest in studies,” “She gets carried away by her friends,” “He is wasting his time,” “She is wasting her talents,” “How can we make him decide what he wants do in life?” “Why is she not listening to us?”…

Where are these complaints coming from? Why, even though a young-one knows that it is about his or her own life, about his or her own success and happiness… yes, in spite of knowing it so well, why do they cause such anxiety in their parents’ minds?

Yesterday, parents of three young boys met me through the day… Yes, with the very same anxiety: “Sir, please do something!”

These young men are lost. 

All that is needed is to help them, in some way or the other, find themselves. 

Yes, I speak to these young-men from my heart… I try, in my most sincere way, to tell them that all that they have to do is to look within, find what they are excited about and inspired to do, trust in their hearts, believe in their minds... and, then, decide to pursue it with all the passion, commitment and honesty. I tell them, that when this discovery happens – when they find their vocations – everything else will fall in place… No reminders needed from anyone… No force. Most of the times, the young-ones understand this language of my heart… Many a times, they find it difficult to break the old habit patterns… But, one thing, certainly, happens: They go back, a lot sensitized…

I think, that itself is a major breakthrough in one’s life: When one is sensitized towards self-responsibility, that paves path for all those wonderful things which await just outside our hearts’ doors.

In my own case, in spite of my so-called a ‘good-boy' nature, I had no clue on what I wanted to do in my life till I reached first-year B’Com. Then, inspired by my teacher and hero, Prof. Raman, I saw the dream coming alive in my heart: I was dreaming to be like him – a fine teacher. 

 

It was over for me. 

I had found myself. 

Then on, no one needed to remind me, coax me, force me, bully me, worry about me… It was my life, and I knew what I wanted to do with it. I told it to my simple parents… and, they believed in me… felt proud about me… promised me to stay by me all along… 

Before long, I found myself telling what my dream was to all those who mattered in my life… And, they too believed in me, encouraged me… felt proud.

It was my discovery… I had found myself.

Parents worry when their young-ones aren’t able to find themselves, and understandably so. So, I tell them, with all my honesty and experience, that all that they have to facilitate is this self-discovery…

When we are lost, we need help… 

 

And, there cannot be a help handier 

and more effective than ‘self-help’…

“Oh Boy, come on! Hold your own hand… your head upright… your heart humble and hungry… and march on. Because, it is your life, honey!”

Yes, it is my life… It is my business.

I have no argument.

It is over. 

Amen.

GERALD D’CUNHA

Pic.: Abhishek Iyer