WHEN I HAVE WATCHED MY FEARS STANDING ON TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN














Pic.: Aparna Khanolkar Sheth


“When you focus on being a blessing,
God makes sure that you are always blessed in abundance.”
- Joel Osteen


One of the worst things, sometimes, I do towards my own well-being is: I try to prove someone how much I have done to him or her. Let me tell you this: I have never ever succeeded in proving this to anyone... On the contrary, I have only come out badly bruised attempting to do it.

The urge to prove my contribution towards another stems from my own insecurity and fear. Had I contributed through my love, I wouldn’t have landed in a state like this... That is, with this need to prove.

So, now and then, when I indulge in it, I can sense, so clearly, how it feels and what it does to my well-being and self-confidence... It drains my energy, leaves me with a feeling of being a loser in life... Yes, it does.

Anger and arguments don’t change the reality even a bit. At best – rather, at worst – they only try to shut the other person’s voice...

What comes from true love comes just the way light comes from the Sun, and just the way Life comes from the air...

Yes, if God were to keep a count of what He had been doing to me!

The less I think about my contribution to others, the more I sense their love and respect towards me... The less I argue and try to prove, the more freedom and peace I feel in my heart... The less I try to squeeze, the more I would find within...

The times I have felt on top of the world, the times I have experienced in my soul that flight-of-an-eagle, the times I have felt really, really good about myself... are only those times when I have loved and let go... when I have given and let go... when I have never doubted in God’s kindness... His abundant supply of mercy and strength... when I have knelt down and thanked Him from the depths of my soul...

When I have trusted...

When I have refused to keep a count of what I have given to others...

When I have watched my fears standing on top of the mountain...

Yes, when I have chosen to love... and let the rest in my life ‘be’!


GERALD D’CUNHA

Comments

Anonymous said…
Could relate to what uhave said. Thanks.
June 29, 2014 at 9:23 PM
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