CONFIDENCE IS ALL ABOUT THE ACTIONS YOU TAKE NOT THE POSTURES YOU STRIKE

Pic.: Nisha Patel

CONFIDENCE IS ALL ABOUT THE ACTIONS YOU TAKE NOT THE POSTURES YOU STRIKE

- Sandeep Jayaswal

(Articulate professional/Travel and sports enthusiast/Mentor)

Belief in self… the trust in my abilities, that I am capable of doing something, is confidence to me. As a topping, knowledge, being positive, preparedness, favorite dress, power, trust and success adds to my confidence in whatever I do.

I would like to share my experiences at various junctures of my life depicting the reasons for my confidence.

SPEAKING YOUR MIND

When I was young, the most perplexing question was: “Why do I get frightened asking a question to my teacher while a few others don’t?” I got frightened, because, I did not want people looking at me. And I just didn't want to bring too much attention on myself.

Was it lack of confidence?

For years, I observed, that, questions asked by others were not always wise. That was when I realized, that speaking your mind was confidence... 

When you ask a question, either you are wise or wiser knowing the other’s perspective.

BELIEVING TO HANDLE WHAT COMES UP

It was summer vacation and I stayed back in school for football camp as our school team was to represent zone in the Inter-Zonal competition. Presence of some amazing players had made our team strongest in the zone. A week into the camp and our coach called me, one day, to discuss if I could lead the team. Technically, I wasn’t the best player nor the senior-most and, hence, I hesitated.

My coach told me, “I like the confidence and calmness in you when you are on the field. The manner in which you handle the situation, anticipate the move and instruct others are good”.

Maybe, confidence doesn’t, always, come from being the best-skilled, but, also, from believing to handle what comes up. One needs to have the requisite confidence to deliver one’s qualitative performance that will mark the very foundation of success.

FOCUS AND DETERMINATION

I ran my first marathon when I was 9-year old, in school, for 6-km and I completed it with good timing for the age. On the contrary, I could not complete the 7-km dream-run in Mumbai Marathon when I was stronger, had better stamina and knew the technique. I had to walk quite a long distance!

Was my stamina better when I was a kid?

It was confidence in self to make it. Maybe, that focus and determination without any distraction gave me that confidence.

TRUST

Stage phobia has never left me live the way I wanted ever since my childhood. I was made school captain in tenth standard and, hence, required to take morning assembly every day. Nothing could have been brutal than facing about two-thousand students, teachers on the stage and commanding students for assembly activities. “School ATTENTION”, “School AT EASE” are the phrases which haunted me days before I was supposed to take my first assembly. I would have practiced more than one-thousand times on the previous day still could not overcome my nervousness.

It was two minutes with Principal Sir, before the assembly, that gave me confidence. “You have been identified from among the best and we all trust you,” were his words.

NOT AFRAID TO BE WRONG

During campus placement, while at MBA, most of the companies preferred group discussion as tool to shortlist. I failed to make any impact in first nine interviews for my summer placement. In the tenth attempt, I spoke in favour of Bill Clinton about Lewinsky scandal and I was selected.

Probably, for the first time, I was not afraid to be wrong. I learnt very important chapter in my life, that people not always see the ideal facts, but how confident you are presenting it… They want to see the conviction in you.

EXPECTING SUCCESS

One of my friends from Lucknow was asked to shift to Chennai by his employer company to take charge of the south zone call-center with two-hundred employees. He had an option to say ‘No’ for the obvious reasons, such as - new place, different culture, unknown language and, most importantly, new people. Moreover, he was expecting promotion and any adverse performance could jeopardize it.

We know, that pessimism can undermine the performance, creating a self-fulfilling prophecy. However, maybe, the confidence comes from success or by expecting success… 

My friend went to Chennai with complete positive attitude, got promoted and relocated  to Mumbai within a year!

Definitely, it requires a shift in mental attitude to an expectation of success which can bring about more success, reinforcing the confidence.

It’s like we, often, expect failure; so, why not expect success? They're both possible circumstances; and, in most, one is not more likely than the other.

To conclude, I can only say, that confidence is you, your strength and ability. There will, always, be someone who is wiser, prettier, smarter, and richer than you, just like there will, always, be someone who is less sagacious, less attractive, less intelligent, and less affluent than you are… All of this is irrelevant, and what is relevant is: caring about advancing your own goals and dreams.

Beware, confidence is not a guarantee for success; but, being confident does improve likelihood of success. And it’s all about the actions you take not the postures you strike.

MY SENSE OF SELF-ACCEPTANCE –

THE GOOD, THE BAD AND THE UGLY

- Swami Brahmavidananda Saraswati

(Spiritual teacher. Management Consultant/Trainer)

Here are a few things that make me confident in my life…

My awareness of what I am…

My strengths and weaknesses…

Owning up my weaknesses and working on them as and when necessary.

My sense of self-acceptance – the good, the bad and the ugly.

The freedom that comes from my sense of responsibility

The higher purpose in life that I have committed myself to.

Being a loving and caring person – capable of giving and receiving love and care.

Living a life of wisdom and integrity and helping others discover the same,

Lastly, and the most important, the Vedic wisdom that has blessed me

and teaching the same to those who seek it.

SOMETIMES, OUR INNER VOICE IS ENOUGH

TO MAKE US CONFIDENT

– Priyanka Kaka

(Age 19)

Appreciating, encouraging and praising words make me confident.

When I hear from my friends, “Yes, you can help us in Maths,” –

it makes me confident in doing Maths.

When I solve problems in Math on my own, it makes me confident.

We cannot be appreciated at every moment by others.

Sometimes, our inner voice is enough to make us confident.

When I feel right, satisfied after some work – it makes me confident.

(P.S.:These are the write-ups by successful professionals and impromptu speeches made by our on-going PD-course students on the topic: ‘WHAT MAKES ME CONFIDENT’. I shall be sharing them here on my blog for some days, and they will be published in a book by the same title on 12th June, 2016, the day of the certification.)

GERALD D'CUNHA