IF GOLD RUSTS, WHAT THEN CAN IRON DO?

“It is far easier to love an infallible god

than fallible human beings.”
― Marty Rubin

On my nephew, Macklin’s (my elder brother’s son) wedding day, I was the toastmaster. I did two goof-ups that day…

Let me take you through the first goof-up...

Macklin, after completing his B.E., had decided to be a sailor like his father. The difference was this: while his father had become a sailor after his ITI as a technician in the engine department, Macklin wanted to climb the ladder from the Fourth Engineer up to the Chief Engineer. I did not know about what people did on ships… The engine and the deck, both, appeared same to me till that mid-noon while I was raising the toast… I recalled my brother Franklin’s obsession with machines when he was a young boy… He was simply crazy about mechanical things. Dad’s old Favre-leuba watch and our antique alarm-watch… My brother alone knows how many times he had ripped them open and zipped them back! He possessed a sturdy Hercules bicycle, which he would redesign the way Dilip Chhabria would redesign the rich folks’ cars! Our grandfather would get hyper seeing my brother’s obsession with watches, clocks and bicycle and yell: “Bapoi engineer, puuth engineer”… Translated from our mother tongue, Konkani, he meant: “Father is an engineer… Son is an engineer.”

You see, our grandfather was a simple farmer. His son was a mechanic and grandson, too, was one. But, to his simple mind, both of them were ‘Engineers’!

So, on Macklin’s wedding day, I recalled our grandfather’s yelling and, wanted to tell 1000-odd guests, that ‘engineering’ and love for machines ran in my brother’s family blood… “Father was an engineer (read mechanic!) and son was an engineer (a real one)”!

“May your ship sail long and strong,” I had wished the couple. And, I had wished Macklin to become the Captain of a ship, soon.

Only deck guys can become Captains and the engine guys can only hope to become the Chief Engineers. I learnt it, that day… when, from the dais, Macklin corrected me: “Uncle, not the Captain, but the Chief Engineer!”

“I stand corrected, dear,” I instantly pleaded on the mike!

During the lunch time, a suited-booted young-man, came up to me to point out my second goof-up… “Uncle, it’s not Deepak Chhabria,” he said, “It’s Diip Chhabria.” This young man, he told me, was a friend of Macklin. Till it was brought to my notice, I hadn’t realized the faux pas I had committed. Anyway, only the young guys knew the difference between a Dilip and a Deepak, I consoled myself… But, I quickly admitted to my goof-up and said, “Did I say Deepak? Oh, no!”

“Hota hai, uncle,” another suited-booted young man, standing next, calmed me down.

Just this Sunday, after returning from our Tai Chi camp at Lonavala, I had blogged about one of Jesus’ miracles – raising the dead Lazarus back to life. “Jesus had performed several miracles,” I had written, “but, this was the only miracle in which He had raised a dead to life.”

Shyla, my friend, who had shared my Post, had received an instant feedback from one of her friends. Shyla was gently nudged by her friend to bring to my notice (in a private message) the fact, that Lazarus was not the ‘only’ dead person Jesus had raised to life, He had raised the dead daughter of Jairus, too. My heart skipped a beat! I, immediately, fact-checked… and, Lo! There was one more dead person whom Jesus had brought to life… It was the son of the widow at Nain!

“Shyla, thanks to you and your friend, both,” I replied, “I have done the necessary correction.” And, I joked, “I have pleaded mercy for my sin!”

I remembered a Sister from our parish. Many years ago, there was a prayer meet at our residence and many of our area members had assembled at our place. This Sister was leading the prayer meet. During the discussion, a woman mentioned about a controversial statement the then Pope had just made, which had invited a lot of criticism. “Our Pope could have avoided making such a statement,” the particular woman had expressed her feelings, honestly. The Sister looked at all of us and said, “My dear brothers and sisters, don’t forget, even a mighty elephant can, sometimes, fall!”

“Hota hai, uncle!” The young man might have said so casually, that afternoon… Lekhin, hota hai.  

I ask: “If the Pope can stumble, what then can I do?” Yes, just as Geoffrey Chaucer had asked: “If gold rusts, what then can iron do?”

And, why on earth am I digging up these graves, today?

It seems, our Finance Minister, Nirmala madam and our Railways and Commerce Minister, Piyush Sir have just done some faux pas… And, our twitter fellows are having loads of fun at our Union ministers’ expense!

The Pope, I remember, when realized his faux pas, had expressed regrets and asked for forgiveness. I thought it was the right thing to do being ‘The Pope’…

After Jesus was nailed on the cross, according to the instructions of Governor Pontius Pilate, an inscription was posted above Jesus’ head: The famous INRI… the abbreviation for the Latin phrase - ''Iesus Nazarenus Rex Iudaeorum''. Meaning, ''Jesus of Nazareth, King of the Jews''.

When the chief priests of the Jews objected to it and said to Pilate, "Do not write, 'The King of the Jews,' but only that He said, 'I am the King of the Jews.'", the Roman Governor had nailed it with all his authority: “What I have written, I have written”!

Yes, even the mighty elephants can fall, sometimes. But, it’s not easy for many elephants to accept their fallibility, you see!

To err is human. To say ‘I erred’ is super human!

GERALD D’CUNHA

Pic.: Prasad Radhakrishnan

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