THE GRACIOUS MOTHER




“Parents are the bones on which
children cut their teeth.”

Peter Ustinov

Last week, when the twelfth-standard results were out (State Board), students and some parents started calling me or texting me one after another. Mostly, they were the ones who were very happy with the results. That’s understandable. When the results are not satisfactory, it’s difficult to open up about it… unless there is enough strength inside one’s heart… That is not unusual. But, this time around, there was one young girl and her mother who surprised me… The mother shared the screen shot of her daughter’s marks-sheet and wrote, “Thank you very much Sir, for everything.”

The girl’s marks in all subjects ranged between 41 and 77 (including in the subject I had taught her).

Was this parent being sarcastic, or was she hiding her disappointment behind this statement?

What about me – was I disappointed with my student’s performance?

Well, like the mother of this girl, her teacher, too, would have loved to see a better result. But, then, she was the mother of her daughter… and, I was the teacher. We both had to love the kid unconditionally… which we did!

I, immediately, got in touch with my student and mother and tried to comfort them. Surprisingly, it was I who came out comforted!

This student of mine has a twin sister. The twin sister has greater learning disabilities. Relatively, my student has less. The mother had described to me the challenges the kids had to face right from their birth. So, for her, the result – whatever it be – was the grace of God… She was prepared to accept it with gratitude.

As a mother, she knew, that her daughters had done their best. As a teacher, I, too, knew, that my student had done her best… There ended all conflicts, all disappointments!

The young girl is high on compassion and gratitude. I am sure, it is the legacy she has inherited from her mother. When you go through ordeals in life, it can make you a very compassionate and grateful person. Yes, it can make many others harsh and ungrateful, too… I know. I, myself, had scored like this young girl has, at her age… The result? I mean, the result of my result?

True. It made me compassionate… I never, ever condemned or glorified my own students because of their exam results. If I could do fairly well in life, they, too, can, and will… Yes, this is my steadfast belief!




Many parents, who are constantly in touch with the teachers throughout the academic year, out of exceptional love and concern for their young ones, do not get in touch with the same teachers once the results are out… often, regardless of the results. I am not judging here. For, I really do not know what is going on at the other end…

This Post is only about the girl who scored less and her gracious mother. As I said, they have comforted me, and, made me remain steadfast in what I have always believed in.


GERALD D’CUNHA

Pic.: pixabay

Video:  Mark Pakula/Kennedy Center Honors

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