SUCCESS STORY

"All our lives, we just do three things: We stand, we sit or we lie down," says Byron Katie. "Rest is all a 'story' we make around it."

'Loving What Is', Mrs. Katie's path-breaking book, is one of my all-time favourites. Each time I am stressed out chasing my goals, each time I become overwhelmed by the perennial anxiety that runs through my search, I open the book and hear her say this:

"Honey, relax ... Give me one stress-free reason to keep, to hold on to, your beliefs about Success, your story."

I find none. And, I am, immediately, relaxed.

Right now, I am 'sitting' and writing this blog piece. I have not premeditated on what I have to write, nor have I fantasised about its success, popularity, money, awards - and all that which Mrs. Katie brands as 'story around the concept of success'. I am just flowing with my heart's yearnings, with no concept whatsoever, no expectations, no strings attached to my pursuit.

It is such a stress-free experience!

I read about Mr. Arvind Adiga, who recently won the 'Booker's' for his maiden novel - 'The White Tiger'. Incidentally, he hails from my native town Mangalore, and we both are the proud alumni of the same St. Aloysius College. Mr. Adiga is much younger than me. But, much high he has reached, just by a single turn of the wheel!

Am I jealous? Mortally, I am.

Mr. Chetan Bhagat's third novel - 'The Three Mistakes Of My Life' is lying before me. On the inside of the front cover, there is his picture. He looks so fresh, boyish and handsome ... and his profile reads: IIT, IIM(A). An Investment Banker, highly acclaimed author of three best-sellers, two of them already made into Bollywood movies ... Not every young man can dream of such achievements. Not as a writer, at least. That, too, in India!

Am I jealous? Mortally, yes.

So, my mind, sometimes - most of the times - asks: "What about me? When am I going to see that day?" And, a bad sensation is sure to run through my body, almost making my heart crippled.

Those are the moments, I take shelter in Mrs. Katie's soothing words: "Honey relax ..."

Before the Harry Potter's magic wand brought Mrs. J.K. Rowling this unbelievably stupendous success, both in fame and Pounds, she was a heart-broken soul; divorced and wretched. From the pits of such penury, she created this humble boy Harry Potter. Yes, just to keep her and her little daughter from dying. What happened from then on - is pure magic!

Am I jealous? Mortally, yes, I am.

I, some times, wonder: Why doesn't Ms. Arundhati Roy come out with more and more of award-winning books? Why did Mrs. Agatha Christie mysteriously disappeared when her first husband deserted her? Did Ms. Ayn Rand's life end on a happy note? Can I ever write as prolifically as these famous writers did?

I don't think I can.

The other day, some one asked me this: "Want to become as famous and as successful as Mr. Salman Rushdie?"

"No," I said, without even blinking.

Either I don't like Fatwa's, or I don't like his girl friends!

"Then, Honey, why do you want to become a famous, wealthy author? Why can't you just write, and relax," I hear Mrs. Katie asking me so sweetly.

This piece is complete. It is time to 'stand' and stretch a little. Maybe, to 'lie down', for a while ... till I 'sit', once again, for my next piece!


GERALD D'CUNHA

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