When I was in school, or even college (almost to the end of First-year B’Com), I wasn’t good in studies. Nor was I good in any extracurricular activities. I was too self-conscious and very afraid to assert myself before by peers and teachers.
When your confidence level is low, everything you do turns out to be bad, ugly. And, if you have around you teachers or elders who keep constantly pointing at your mistakes – how bad and ugly you are – then, it is a sure-shot way to hell!
What was bad - and, perhaps, ugly - was your ‘work’… But, those people with authority – your elders, seniors, and teachers – did not know how to communicate it to you… They were impatient; they were blunt. So, though they wanted to tell you that you needed to improve in your work… that, it was bad, ugly… they only ending up telling you, “You are useless, bad… ugly!”
Only patience and trust can help us see the good human being in a bad work!
In my case, there were some wonderful people – one of them was my simple mom. They did see a good soul in my so-called shoddy work. They had tremendous amount of faith in me… They had loads of patience.
Later, as a new-comer in Mumbai, I was struggling to get a foothold in this big city. My nervousness had reached almost its boiling point. I had got a temporary job in an Insurance Company. I have written about it before; but, I am doing it again, today: there were two seniors around me, almost of the age of retirement. What is still strange to me is how these two individuals reacted to my mistakes (I used to do a hell-lot of them!). One would help me out every time I faltered; he had loads of patience… would always remind me that I would do well in life, provided I learnt from my mistakes. The other one was extremely reactive and impatient. He only saw my mistakes… and, nothing beyond that. He would report every silly mistake of mine to the Department Head… and, I dreaded even the shadow of this man!
Today, at this stage – as I write all my daily Blog Posts – I still make my own mistakes and I still have these two types of people in my life. That has helped me remain firmly grounded… Yes, as a teacher, whenever I tend to scream at my students for their mistakes, my own days come back to me. I quickly retract… change my tone... try, earnestly, not to condemn the person, but point to his mistakes. No, honestly, it is not easy even with all my wisdom. As a teacher, as man of authority, or as a parent or senior – I, quite many times, slip into this trap of impatience… I fail to see the good human in a bad work!
To show patience is to show Love. That is why, it is, sometimes, said: “If you have patience, you need no other virtues!”
What do we see in our little children as we raise them, nurse them and love them?
What do we see in the little seeds as we plant them in our gardens, care for them and hope?
To show patience
towards another fellow-being
is a huge investment that we can ever make!
And, pleasantly, it costs us nothing!
Once, a little girl went to a farm to buy a watermelon.
“Sir, how much does it cost?” she asked the farm-owner.
“That is a big one, dear; it will cost you three dollars,” replied the man.
“But, sir, I have only thirty cents with me,” explained the little one.
“Would you like to take home that one?” the farm-owner pointed to a green melon which was still to grow.
“Alright sir,” replied the girl, “please take these thirty cents and let the melon be here in the farm. I will come again, after a month, to take it home!”
Yes sir, we need to invest in small melons with lots of love, trust and confidence. And, yes, yes... with loads and loads of patience, as well!
Pics.: Vinod Korganonkar