NOT AT LEAST TODAY BETA... NOT AT LEAST TODAY SIR






Pic.: Ruma Chatterjee

As per our son’s suggestion, last night, we had my b’day dinner, quietly, on the roof-top restaurant, ‘Koyla’, at Colaba. He knew that I did not like crowded and noisy restaurants... So, ‘Koyla’, with its beach-inspired ambiance, fitted the bill, perfectly. But, there was one condition we had agreed upon: to switch off our cell-phones...

No regrets... even though there were two-dozen missed-calls and another two-dozen messages... The roof-top did not come down, nor did my heart fail to beat!

Late night, after returning home, I picked one of the calls. It was Kushal*, a twelfth-standard student of mine. He had his class, early this morning. So, almost close to midnight, when I got his call to wish me, though I felt very nice, I reminded him about today’s early-morning class... There was a home-work to be done... He had been skipping homework, almost, every class... and, almost, in every class, he had been getting my ‘special sermon’... But, then, he would obediently look at me, listen to me, promise me... and, come to my class, the next class, once again, without the homework... I would scream and shout, he wouldn't feel bad about it, I would... “Sorry sir, I will not repeat my mistake,” I would feel relieved... But, the very next class, lo! There was one more lame excuse!

Kushal wants to do Law. Fair enough. My subject, Accountancy is not very important to his plans... But, the fact that he makes his promises and breaks it worries me. “It is not about Accountancy dear,” I remind him, “It is about the promise you make and fail to keep... It is about the damage it does to your own self-esteem... It is about the habit pattern your silently allow in you to form... It is about managing time, keeping yourself motivated to do things you do not like, but still have to do...”

Well, all this, my student – who, I know loves and worships me – listens without any resistance... But, then, something happens between the promise he makes and breaks!

Last night, I did remind Kushal to come to class, today morning, with the home-work.

“Yes sir, I will,” he promised “Have a beautiful night sir.”

”You too, beta,” I felt nice.

And, this early this morning, when I looked at my dear Kushal’s face, I knew what it was telling me..

“Oh, no beta, not today... not today!” I said with all the sweetness and honesty of my heart, “You know what, yesterday I had made my own b’day promise to myself... that, at least for one day – that is today – I would not scream and shout at my students, whatever be their mistakes... Beta, you had wished me good health and happiness, last night... Hadn't you? No beta, at least today, you should have turned up with your home work... at least for your sir’s sake...”

My dear Kushal’s face was telling me that he really felt for me. “Look my dear students,” I told the whole class, this is 8 in the morning, my fist batch... My last batch will end at 8.30 tonight... If I feel disappointed, irritated and angry, like this - right now and through all my day - imagine my ‘health and happiness’ when my day ends... I have to maintain my freshness and energy at their peak till I wind up, today.. How will I? How will I have good health and happiness when I go back home? How will I keep alive my own motivation to come back for work, tomorrow morning?”

I looked at Kushal, with all my love-turned-anguish, and said, once again, “Not at least today, beta... Not today!”

“Sorry sir,” Kushal sincerely apologized for hurting me, “I am really sorry.”

When my students realize their mistakes, and sincerely own up, I become peaceful...

After the class, I came to my office and opened my FB account... and, behold! “Today is Kushal’s birthday... Wish him,” all merciful FB reminded me...

My heart went numb!

“No Gerry, not today,” I hid my face in my palms, “At least for today, you should have kept your promise!”

I did not wait to inbox my dear student, who must have, by now, just entered his home:

“Hey Kushal, I feel bad when I think of the repeated scolding I give u.
 I did not know it was ur b’day...I wouldn't have...
But, u know why I do it!!!

Dear, wish u a very happy b’day... and wish all the good things in life...

Love you.”

Before I could re-read what I had scribbled, there flashed Kushal’s reply:

 “No sir, I completely understand, why you did it...

Thank you.”


Who has to change?

My heart is still smiling... and my head is still swinging...

Trust me, I am happy.

* Name is changed

GERALD D’CUNHA

Comments

Tushar Dhing said…
So touching ans o humbling!

Tushar Dhing
July 25, 2014 at 3:48 PM
Girish Vasu said…
Simply superb!!! Girish Vasu
July 25, 2014 at 5:02 PM
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