THE 'PRESENCE' IN OUR RELATIONSHIPS
Pic.: Ruma Chatterjee
Right now, some of my most
significant people in life – my wife, son, mom, my in-laws, brothers and their
families, some close friends and well-wishers - are not physically present here,
from where I am working. Still, I can feel their strong presence around me... I
can feel their warmth, their acceptance, their love and validation.
Not even for fraction of a
second, I sense their absence... I do not feel the urge to talk to them, be
next to them... enquire about them, least of all, complain or crib about
them... I know they are all safe as I am here... I know they all think about me
as I do about them... I know they all feel my presence just as I feel theirs
here, now...
So, what is this strange
phenomenon called in love and relationship?
‘Presence’?
I have been coining this word,
since last evening...
I do not need to call-up or
text someone near-and-dear to say, “I love you” or “I miss you”... Or to say,
“You are awesome” or “Thank you for being there”...
I do not need to enquire about
his or her health or happiness...
I do not need to reassure my
love and friendship...
I do not need to fear, feel
insecure or threatened, of all the things...
So, this magical something
called ‘Presence’... yes, does this golden moment in our relationship, actually
exist? Or, is it just a fantasy?
I have ample reason to believe
that ‘Presence’ in our relationships, in deed, exists and it is not any fantasy
or figment of our imagination... For,
right since last evening - and right now - yes, I can not only feel this golden
moment, I can even touch it, breathe it... soak in it...
Believe me, none of my
near-and-dear ones are next to me; but, I can feel and sense their
‘presence’... their warmth, love and security.
Then, why am I, many a times,
unable to experience this golden moment called ‘Presence’? Why, often – so
often – I am desperate to be with my loved-ones, talk to them, enquire about
them, check on them, advice them, guard them, feel loved and cared for by them,
validated and accepted by them... and, all this in person, live...? Why do I
feel so insecure and even threatened, at times? Why do I feel lost and unloved?
Why do I, so often, complain and crib... Don’t get enough of it?
Well, I may call it ‘Lack’ or
‘Fear’, whatever... But, I do feel, many times, all of it in my relationships...
And, I do feel, quite often, the golden moments of ‘Presence’, too...
And, at the end of the day, I
do come to the conclusion, that, ‘Presence’ is the only time when I truly allow
the invisible third-partner in all relationships – GOD – to play His role...
The rest of the time, I snub
our invisible third-partner...
Do I feel His presence in my
relationships?
Since last evening, I do...
Yes, I do.
GERALD D’CUNHA
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