The first thing I have been doing these days, the moment I step into my office, is to visit my own blog… Read, edit, write or comment.
There are days – in fact, months – I may not touch my blog. And, there are days, like now, I just can’t live and breathe without it.
But, then, why do I do it? I get no money by all this. I get no mileage through any publicity. Though I have lots of my well-wishers, who keep reading what I write, they (Like I my self do for others) don’t send any comments… And, I do not have any cheerleaders at home to pump me to go on. Still, every morning, and sometimes for long hours, I keep being by myself… by my blog.
Long before this blog thing came about, I would keep doing the same on my diaries… on old envelopes, on torn sheets… I would write the same way… But, I don’t remember writing them for any one or for any thing. I would just keep writing… and for years on. I have dozens of those diaries and hundreds of such sheets and envelopes.
Yes, sometimes, when I do all this, I forget my hunger, I forget my sleep. I even forget to pay my bills!
They say, any thing that you do without being told – and do it without caring for money, fame or position – is your calling in life, your vocation. How, true! There are so many things in my life, I just do reluctantly… just because of some compulsions… and I know how I feel doing them, what kind of quality it wears… and, what it does to my self-esteem. I may console myself justifying that ‘I have to do them, any way.” But, that doesn’t change the way I feel about myself.
Just two days ago, one of my very dear students so lovingly sent this message:
“Sir, I loved what you wrote, today.
It was so amazing.
I keep wondering how do you do it,
again and again, every day… But, you do it!
Sir, never ever stop writing.
We need them… I need them.
Thank you for being there.”
It was late night. Some one was going to bed touched by what I had written that day. And, I was
going to bed touched by that satisfaction, that joy.
If the first thing I do when I start my day can make me so peaceful when I end my day, then, I
should keep doing what I do.
Thank you dear, for being there!